Chapter 196
‘You can’t even guide properly, you can’t behave obediently. You’re a lot of trouble, and now you’re shameless too.’
‘…’
‘Did I expect too much from you? I just asked you not to cause any major trouble while I’m risking my life in battle, to stay out of trouble.’
‘…’
‘I gave up money, honor, and pride to have you. I threw away 4 billion Berks, made enemies of all the Espers, and endured the humiliation of being led away in shackles in front of everyone. And the moment you’re left to your own devices, you couldn’t even endure this short time and made such a mess.’
Even Claude, who had become somewhat tolerant of my antics, reacted sensitively when his possessiveness over me was threatened.
Facing the Espers who wanted me again, Claude, with a fed-up look, spewed venomous words at me.
Facing such unfiltered criticism, I completely crumbled.
I wanted to defend myself. It wasn’t like that.
I just wanted to show him. That I wasn’t a child who needed his unilateral protection, but an adult who could be his support at times. That I could overcome the problems I faced with my own strength.
But…
In trying to follow Azir’s advice, I ended up publicly making Claude a criminal.
In trying to avoid making Claude pay a 2 billion-Berk fine for imprinting with me, I ended up costing him twice that amount, 4 billion Berks.
Trying to help Daniel because I felt guilty for the harm I had caused him, I ended up revealing that I wasn’t branded.
Why am I like this? Why am I so pathetic?
The words of Claude in my imagination weren’t real, but there wasn’t a single thing wrong about them.
All my attempts to solve problems caused by me only made things worse.
In the end, Claude, looking down at me with tearful eyes, opened his mouth. It wasn’t to offer warm comfort.
“Don’t cry, Rose Valentine. I’m getting really sick of it.”
His tired mumbling was the last thing I heard before waking up. My body was drenched in cold sweat, and my chest was so tight with anxiety that even breathing was difficult.
Having come to the Guide Division after a sleepless night, it was no wonder I looked terrible to others.
“Do you have any worries?”
“…It’s nothing like that.”
“If you have concerns, you should share them with us.”
“That’s right. We’re here to listen.”
Simeyez and Epine looked down at me with concern.
I looked up at them with a heavy heart.
Right now, they seemed to care for me… but would their attitude remain unchanged once the whole truth was revealed?
…Of course not. Who am I kidding?
“I’m fine, really.”
“…”
Forcing a bitter smile, I spoke, and Simeyez and Epine looked disappointed.
I pressed my tired eyelids and mumbled.
“It’s really nothing. It’s just… whenever I came home, Claude used to always greet me, but he’s not there now, so I’ve been feeling lonely. The house felt so empty and silent. I couldn’t sleep well at night. That’s all.”
“Ah…”
Simeyez and Epine nodded, seeming to understand.
“Yeah… that makes sense.”
“Then, Rose, why don’t we go out into town today? It might lift your spirits. We can have some good food.”
“Umm…”
I appreciated their intention, but…
“I’m just too tired from not sleeping. Maybe another time.”
“Ah, right, today might be too much. You must be really tired, Rose?”
“Then let’s call it a day and plan another time to go out. Is that okay?”
“Sure.”
As we were about to leave the Guide Division together, something felt off. The entrance was unusually crowded with guides gathered as if there was something interesting to see.
“What’s going on? Is there something happening today?”
“…I haven’t heard anything. It reminds me of that time. When Lord Claude came to pick you up… Ah, Rose, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…”
Epine apologized hastily after speaking thoughtlessly.
“It’s okay.”
I replied nonchalantly. I had been thinking the same thing.
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