Campus Log - Chapter 54

I had to think that way.

If expectations were too high, disappointment would only be greater. It was better for my own well-being to assume that he was just someone who needed someone to rely on, someone who made friends in this kind of way.

***

Before going to afternoon classes, I stopped by a café near the back gate of the school.

“Do you have a birthday coupon? Should I apply it for you?”

“Yes.”

All drinks were free for customers on their birthday, but I insisted on an iced Americano. The most I could compromise on was a latte without syrup. Ruining my taste with sugar bombs like frappuccinos was something I absolutely hated.

“Happy birthday! Happy birthday!”

While I was waiting for my coffee, a loud song suddenly burst out from a group of students sitting in the middle of the café.

“Happy birthday to our beloved Subin!”

At the center was Yang Subin. A camera was set up on one side of the table, likely for a vlog, and her friends were holding a cake decorated with colorful designs.

“What do I do. I’m so touched.”

Coincidentally, Yang Subin also seemed to be celebrating her birthday today. The girl, wearing a party hat properly, blew out the candles decorating the cake. As applause rang out once again, the coffee I had ordered finally came out.

I tried not to compare my situation with Yang Subin’s.

Choosing a path where there was no friend to buy a cake and celebrate with was my own decision. I was the one who pushed everyone away, thinking it was tiring and meaningless to spend lunch breaks entertaining pointless conversations. So thinking I was lonely at a time like this was selfish.

Without looking at Yang Subin, I pushed open the café door. A wave of hot air, clearly different from the air-conditioned interior, rushed in.

And then, slender fingers with multiple rings tapped my shoulder.

“Excuse me.”

When I turned around, Yang Subin was smiling calmly. A bad feeling made the coffee I had just sipped turn my mouth dry.

“Yes?”

“Are you Eunseok oppa’s friend?”

Last time, she had looked down on me, asking if he even had “friends like that.” The term “friend” definitely marked an upgrade in status.

“Yes.”

I could have corrected it and said I was just a fellow student, but I chose to agree with her question for now. At that moment, the difference between a classmate and a friend probably didn’t matter much to Yang Subin anyway.

“By the way, do you know where Eunseok oppa went this weekend?”

When I heard Yang Subin’s question, my first thought was why she was asking me that, and my second was a clear instinct that I shouldn’t answer honestly.

“I’m not sure. I don’t really know.”

So I lied. I was worried that the moment I revealed he had gone to his family home, it would make my relationship with Ryu Eunseok seem too close, or make it look like I was acting as if I were someone important to him.

If Yang Subin had feelings for Ryu Eunseok beyond simple admiration, then getting involved in their complicated emotional triangle would only put me at a disadvantage.

“Really? He said he went home, so I guess you don’t know the details either.”

What? She already knew, so why was she asking me?

“He suddenly went home, so I was worried. I wondered if something had happened. As you know, Eunseok oppa has had some troubling things going on lately.”

Ignoring the sting of guilt, I suppressed my frown and adjusted my glasses.

“Could I have your phone number?”

“…Pardon?”

A high-pitched voice escaped me despite myself. Putting aside the fact that she kept casually calling me “unnie,” it was already strange enough that she was asking for my contact information when she probably didn’t even know my name properly. It felt like her intentions were far from innocent.

“You’re Eunseok oppa’s friend, right? I just want to get closer to you, unnie.”

Smiling sweetly, Yang Subin held out her phone. Behind her, her friends were watching in this direction.

When I noticed them whispering among themselves, my throat tightened. I had a habit of physically reacting whenever I became the center of unwanted attention. Even though I was still inside the cool café, I could feel heat rising to my face.

The only way to quickly escape unwanted attention was to give the other person what they wanted. I called my own phone using Yang Subin’s device and handed it back.

“Let’s hang out next time with Eunseok oppa, unnie.”

Yang Subin greeted me softly and returned to her seat. Back with her friends, she adjusted the camera angle while checking the footage.

As I passed through the back gate of the school, I saved the missed call number under her name. I just hoped it wouldn’t show up on my screen very often.

After Ryu Eunseok, Song Hyeokjun, Lee Dongha, and now Yang Subin—the list of unfamiliar names in my contacts was growing, and it felt unsettling.

***