Don’t Be Holy! - Chapter 201

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“Is this really okay?”

Anxiety kept making her head turn from side to side. In front of Eir was a wide spread of food, and at the end sat Rubel, who was deboning fish.

Rubel placed the fully deboned fish in front of her and sighed.

“Am I summoning you to host a party in the garden or greenhouse? It’s just a simple meal, why are you so frightened?”

His tone was full of frustration toward her extremely timid nature. However, Eir was rather astounded by his excessive boldness.

A simple meal?

Food was piled high on a table so large that her outstretched arms couldn’t encompass it—far more than two people could eat—and he called this a simple meal?

Moreover, this was the reception room connected to Rubel’s chambers. Since Eir had been captured as a witch, she should rightfully be confined to her room. Yet this man had someone bring Eir here, set out more than ten dishes, and was now deboning fish for her to eat.

When Rubel stared intently at Eir’s cutlery with a certain pressure, she reflexively picked it up, but Eir couldn’t possibly eat comfortably in such an absurd situation.

He slowly rearranged the food, focusing on things she liked and those that would be easy on her stomach, while saying:

“You need to eat well. The last time I saw you, you were far too thin. You could fall ill that way. Especially someone who isn’t healthy to begin with…….”

“I am healthy.”

“Do healthy people collapse so frequently?”

“That was because I lied and received divine punishment. Don’t you remember? I told you I’m a priestess. I had to tell many lies while being with you.”

Eir jutted out her lips, recalling that time. She meant to make him feel guilty, but he only smiled with melting softness.

“Why are you smiling?”

“Because you’re being quite cute right now.”

“I meant for you to feel guilty.”

“Yes. Keep resenting me and telling me about it. It sounds nice.”

He seemed genuinely pleased with Eir’s grumbling, not mocking her at all. Since she couldn’t even begin to guess what was going on in his head, Eir opened her mouth.

Just then, as if he’d been waiting, a spoonful of soup slipped in. Rubel was so considerate that he even lifted her chin to close her mouth in case she might open it again while still chewing.

“Please eat. Even a five-year-old wouldn’t avoid food like this when it’s right in front of them.”

Eir quickly swallowed the remaining food, drank some water, and looked up.

“Do you know you’re acting like a tyrant right now?”

“Me?”

“With the Proxy gone, you’re using your authority to do whatever you please. I’m supposed to be locked inside and unable to come out.”

At that, he burst into laughter.

“So you’re the concubine kept by a tyrant?”

His laughter sounded as if he was mocking her, as if Eir completely mismatched such a provocative description.

Eir pressed her lips together, glared at him, and then decided to just eat the food quickly. It was difficult to break his stubbornness anyway. It would be better to give him what he wanted and end this situation quickly.

Rubel watched her hastily eating and spoke quietly, resting his chin on his hand.

“How amusing. If I were truly acting like a tyrant, you wouldn’t even be sitting here.”

She looked up at these words, and he met her gaze with a smile. Eir stared blankly before suddenly understanding his meaning, feeling her throat constrict as she covered her mouth and coughed.

“Khff……. W-what a shameless thing to say…….”

“Let me clarify to avoid misunderstanding—sharing meals is the entirety of my free time.”

He dropped his shoulders, then picked up his fork and knife. True to his noble upbringing, he ate with neat, elegant movements, handling each bite with precision—completely unlike someone who had just uttered such vulgar innuendo.

Eir pouted her lips and focused on the food again.

She knew well that he was a busy man. And one who never neglected his duties. That must be why he had earned everyone’s trust, and why the Proxy had shown Rubel so much leniency.

She didn’t disregard all he had done, nor his current dedication to the Divine Empire.

But…….

‘That dream…….’

Eir swallowed hard.

It was an unusually vivid dream.

But because it was so brief, and there were no scenes directly showing harm to the Proxy, it could be interpreted differently…… perhaps.

She lacked confidence.

Her past self would have emphatically declared that Rubel could never commit such an act.

But now she was confused. She couldn’t tell how far he might boldly go, or how much he had abandoned his moral principles.

Eir rolled her eyes and suddenly spoke. She felt the need to test him.

“If I were in danger, how far would you go?”

Rubel stared back at Eir, who was looking at him with serious eyes. He couldn’t understand what she was saying.

“Did you get into trouble again so soon?”

“No, I’m just hypothesizing. I’ve been behaving. Just think about it. What if I…… let’s say, got captured by a witch again, what would you do?”

“I would do anything.”

He answered without the slightest hesitation, as if it wasn’t difficult at all. Eir asked again with an anxious face.

“Really? Even killing people?”

“Do you think I haven’t killed people until now?”

“No, I mean, even innocent people? What if that person is extremely important? What if they’re a person of God…….”

“Eir.”

At his serious voice, Eir closed her mouth. This was an issue where he might think she was insulting him.

“I’m sorry. I mean…….”

“Are you afraid?”

But instead of telling her to stop, Rubel asked that. Eir was at a loss for words at the unexpected question. Afraid? Of what?

Seeing her expression, Rubel slightly raised the corner of his mouth with a knowing look before continuing:

“Are you afraid of me?”

“I…….”

Her throat bobbed. Eir, choosing her words, lowered her eyes and answered.

“I’m scared. That I might have ruined you.”

A brief silence followed. The sound of Rubel rising from his seat and approaching was heard. He placed his hand on her cheek and slowly lifted her head. With a gentle expression, he gathered her hands and pressed kisses onto each of her fingers.

“That’s impossible.”

“But what if you go down the wrong path because of me?”

“Do you think you know what is right?”

“Some things are morally and religiously established, aren’t they?”

“Do I seem that corrupted to you?”

He smiled slightly. His breath touched the tips of her fingers. Eir pulled her hand away and answered in a stern voice.

“You haven’t asked anything about me being a runaway priestess. Not why I ran away, even though I abandoned God.”

“Eir.”

But displeased with something again, he called her name as if telling her to close her mouth.

“I told you that doesn’t matter.”

“But how can that not matter? Then what are you judging me by? Is it my body? Is that all that matters?”

“Setting aside whether your body is that impressive, let me ask you this. If I did something wrong, would you suddenly hate me?”

“I…….”

Eir stopped speaking. If Rubel had made wrong choices because of her, she would certainly feel distressed. But would her feelings for Rubel himself change? She wasn’t sure. She couldn’t answer with certainty.

Rubel quietly slipped into that gap, wrapping his arm around her waist and answering:

“You may not know, but I’m not like that. I don’t care what you do.”

“No matter what I do…….”

“Yes. No matter what you do.”

But that didn’t sound as benevolent as it might seem at first glance. Rather, it was tantamount to saying that no matter what she did, he wouldn’t let her go.

Eir felt that something was going increasingly wrong as she touched his hair slipping through her fingers.