Chapter 32

I was lying alone in a dark space.

As memories from before losing consciousness sporadically came back, I didn’t want to wake up. This cozy space, certainly a dream, was dark all around.

‘Let’s stay here.’

The moment I resigned myself, cracks started to form in the void, and a certain scenery overlapped.

“Could this be.”

Old bloodstains everywhere and cold, hard iron bars. Inside the iron bars, packed tightly like chicken coops, were slaves who had lost their will.

I easily realized where this place was that the dream had recreated.

‘The Black Magician’s Experimental Tower!’

The more I got used to the peaceful atmosphere of the Grand Duke’s residence, the more often this place came to mind. If this dream was showing my past from my memories.

Perhaps I could meet Juno, who might not be dead yet, here.

“Juno! Where are you?”

I searched for Juno’s face, moving between the iron bars. Thanks to my body becoming translucent like a ghost, I could pass through anywhere.

Finally, in the farthest iron cage, I found the red hair I was looking for. Without time to think, my hand reached out towards Juno first.

My desperately outstretched hand passed through Juno’s body and just stirred the empty air.

‘I can’t touch?’

I glared at my hand that had become transparent.

“Why am I…”

I had finally met the one I longed for, but I could only look. Kneeling on the floor of the iron cage, I discovered a young child in Juno’s arms.

Red hair lighter than Juno’s.

That dirty child in Juno’s arms is probably.

‘The past me.’

Like Juno, I couldn’t touch my past self either. It felt like being captivated by the illusion of an oasis in a desert without a single blade of grass.

I heard Juno’s voice soothing the past me in her arms from nearby. A forgotten memory from the past was unfolding before my eyes.

“Liat, if you can’t sleep, shall I tell you an interesting story?”

“Go ahead.”

Juno, stroking the back of my sullen-faced past self, began the story in a soft voice. Her face, with shadows falling on it, was incredibly kind.

“Once upon a time, there was a beautiful and strong divine beast. That divine beast was very lonely. So it fell for an obvious deception and died.”

“How’s that happy?”

“What comes after is happy. The divine beast is reborn and receives the love of many people.”

I thought it was quite a foolish story.

Juno didn’t tell me why the divine beast was lonely or how it became human. As if that was my part to imagine in the story.

‘She must have wanted to comfort me.’

During our time together, Juno told me many stories. Because Juno’s imagination wasn’t that rich, all the stories were flimsy.

But I remember that the endings were always the same, as if predetermined.

‘And everyone lived happily ever after.’

Such stories couldn’t soothe hunger or cold. My past self, who had been giving Juno a skewed look all along, opened his mouth.

“There’s no such thing as a divine beast.”

It was an irreverent look, as if looking at a child who believes in fairies. Juno was busy squishing my cheeks, not seeming to mind such an impertinent me.

I resented my past self for being so brusque with her.

Not knowing that she would die before the Grand Duke arrived in the near future. Juno chuckled at my past self’s annoyed reaction and whispered.

“Someday, I’ll give you my power.”

Only then did my past self stare intently at Juno’s face. The violet eyes were filled with nothing but pure curiosity.

I could see right through what my past self was thinking at that time. It must have seemed strange to say you’d give something you couldn’t give.

“Why?”

“Because I have to.”

“Whatever ability it is, I don’t need it.”

The power of the imperial family can’t be given away.

I, who had read the original work, knew that better than anyone. At that time, I was busy counting the days until the Grand Duke would arrive, as in the original work.

I didn’t pay any attention to Juno’s words.

“Liat. Did I ever tell you why I want to give you this power?”

“No.”

Juno smiled softly and kissed my past self’s cheek, whispering lowly.

“Because I don’t want to leave you alone.”

Then you shouldn’t have died and left me.

Unable to overcome my resentment, I raised my head and met Juno’s eyes in the iron cage. For a moment, Juno’s slightly widened eyes curved into crescents.

‘She saw me.’

Her lips moved silently, leaving me some kind of request. It was useless even if she begged me not to leave her behind.

The blurring scenery was soon sucked into a black whirlpool.

***

I felt the cold and the wind ruffling my hair.

When I tilted my head to the side, I saw a wide-open window letting in the wind. The maids taking care of me were nowhere to be seen.

‘I was still alive.’

I thought I would have died this time for sure.

As I was about to fall asleep again, a wet cloth was plopped onto my forehead. A familiar voice chased away my drowsiness.

“Little one, aren’t you thirsty?”

“Stephanie?”

“Yes. You’ve been sick for two whole days.”

I narrowed my eyes, wondering if I was still dreaming. Even after rubbing my eyes, Stephanie didn’t disappear from my sight.

Above all, the cold sensation of the dripping wet cloth reminded me that this was reality.

“Would you like to drink some water?”

Stephanie held a glass of water to my lips.

Water or not, I was busy trying to grasp the situation before me. If it was really Stephanie in front of me now, I had to tell her the truth.

‘You can’t meet Juno.’

That lovely girl who gave me hope was already dead.

The moment I parted my parched lips, Stephanie put her finger to my mouth.

“Shh. We’ll talk later.”

“Why?”

“I came here secretly. And they say it’s not good to talk a lot right after waking up.”

“How are you here, Stephanie?”

Stephanie stared at my face for a moment. Then she said in a slightly subdued voice.

“Gerard told me you were sick, so I asked him to let me come secretly.”

So Gerard helped again.

Even throwing away the apple pie must have been his intention to hide my meetings with Stephanie.

Stephanie stroked my pale cheek with a worried look. I carefully examined her features as she looked down at me.

Now that I realized it, I could see it better.

How much Stephanie resembled Juno.

‘I had imagined it so many times.’

An impossible future where Juno didn’t die and remained by my side as an adult. Next to Juno, who had grown into a wonderful adult beyond the original work, I…

Why is it that what I desire most earnestly never comes true? My chest ached with the realization of Juno’s absence more intensely than ever before.

“Little one. Does it hurt? Does it hurt a lot?”

“It’s not that.”

“You should be honest about pain.”

Stephanie whispered firmly and stood up to get medicine. I desperately grabbed her clothes as she was about to leave my side.

“Don’t go.”

Stephanie hesitated, then sat back down in the chair.

I opened my mouth, thinking it was an opportunity to confess the truth with courage. But before I could utter a word, a thermometer was inserted into my open mouth.

Stephanie’s expression turned serious after checking my temperature on the thermometer she removed.

“Why isn’t the fever going down?”

“Stephanie.”

“Yes. I’m here. You just need to rest well without worrying about anything.”

“That’s not it…”

Please, just listen to me until the end.

The courage I had barely mustered was about to turn into a handful of ashes. I had to close my mouth again as a soaking wet cloth was placed on my forehead.

Stephanie smiled brightly even as water dripped from the cloth, soaking the pillow.

“I soaked it in cold water again. It should be cool.”

“…”

As promised, Stephanie sat nearby without moving far. Her face, saying nothing, looked a bit unfamiliar.

After quite a long silence, Stephanie spoke.

“Actually, I have something to tell you. You knew I’ve been wanting to meet someone, right?”

“…Yes.”

“I think I’ll be able to meet the person I want to see soon. His Grace the Grand Duke has given permission.”

Stephanie showed a bright smile.

Seeing that smile, I could tell how long she had waited for this moment. My feelings sank into the mud as I watched the joyful Stephanie.

I wished what I had just heard was a lie.

“He really said he’d let you meet?”

“There was a condition, though. He said he would raise my daughter.”

“How can that be a condition?”

Even after meeting Stephanie, the Grand Duke still mistook me for the princess. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have set raising me as a condition.

‘This is the worst.’

Soon, the Grand Duke will call Stephanie to the drawing room, saying he’ll let her meet the princess. And instead of the long-awaited princess, I will appear.

I had to tell Stephanie the truth before that tragedy occurred.

“Um… About the daughter you want to meet.”

With each word I spoke, fear overwhelmed me, making it hard to breathe. I closed my eyes tightly and continued speaking as if expelling a nightmare.

“You might not be able to meet her anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

“Because…”

If there’s no way to convey the truth without hurting her, what should I do?

‘No, I can’t say it.’

All our meetings so far must have been Gerard’s unilateral decision, so I didn’t know when I would be able to meet her again. I took a deep breath and started over.

“There was someone very precious to me.”

“And?”

“That person kept asking me for something.”

It was just annoying.

Everything should have proceeded according to the original work, but they kept trying to get involved with me. Even the words whispered to me, who had long given up hope, were unpleasant.

“Liat. Someday, I really want to see you become happy.”

I hated, resented, and also liked them.

Having read the original work, I knew that none of Juno’s wishes would come true. So I tried hard not to get attached.

“As she took care of me, she became weaker and weaker. She had to take the hits instead of me while protecting me.”

It was inevitable that the gradually weakening body would fall ill.

“And the name of that precious person is…”

Crash!

As I was about to continue, I straightened up at the sound of something like a plate breaking. Someone was standing in front of the door to my room, where Stephanie and I were.