Chapter 38

The next afternoon, I went out to the garden with my sketchbook. I was planning to soothe my mood, which had been dampened by the argument with Lucas, through drawing.

‘What should I draw?’ After drawing Lucas to the point of nausea, I didn’t want to draw people. As I was about to try drawing the flowers blooming around me, I heard Sen’s voice from afar.

“Grand Princess! I have good news!”

“I’m busy.”

“Don’t be like that. You’ll be surprised to see who’s here!”

It’s probably the Grand Duke, no doubt.

I reluctantly gathered my sketchbook and stood up, dawdling, unable to resist Sen’s persistence. However, the person standing in front of the door wasn’t the Grand Duke.

A much smaller figure than the Grand Duke, with a beauty that could be mistaken for a woman. His silver hair, bathed in sunlight, shone with a brilliance no less than jewels.

The boy, beautiful as a doll, awkwardly rubbed his forearm with an uneasy gaze.

“Lucas?”

At my call, Lucas’s brow furrowed slightly before smoothing out. Lucas moved his lips, exuding an air of reluctance as he spoke.

“It’s been a while.”

“We saw each other yesterday, didn’t we?”

“Grand Princess, Young Master Lucas has personally come to see you!”

I can see that, Sen.

I shook my head at Sen, whose mouth was spread wide open. Sen was truly sincere in trying to make Lucas and me get along.

Lucas, who glared at me for a moment, walked towards me at an excruciatingly slow pace.

Over Lucas’s grumpy face, the image of his angry expression from yesterday overlapped.

“I just came to give you something.”

“What do you want to give me?”

“Well…”

Like a fish forcibly dragged onto land, Lucas’s complexion changed moment by moment. It seemed all sorts of thoughts were flooding his mind, and watching him, I felt frustrated.

‘Why did you really come?’

Is the gift just an excuse, and did he come to get angry at me? The silver eyelashes fluttering right in front of me were pretty, though.

“Lucas, what’s the reason you came?”

“To give you a gi…”

“Gi?”

As I repeated the last part, his pale face turned bright red.

Lucas, who had been twitching his eyebrows, bit his lip hard and then thrust the box he was holding into my arms. I stared blankly at the box that was forcibly placed in my embrace.

Is he asking me to carry his luggage for him?

As I was pondering the identity of the rather heavy box, I heard a small mumbling sound near my ear.

“It’s a return gift for last time.”

“I don’t remember doing anything that deserves a return gift from Lucas.”

“It’s in return for the picture you drew for me.”

“…Ah.”

I suddenly remembered the picture I had forgotten somewhere in my anger. I hadn’t expected him to personally bring a return gift for it.

‘The mad dog from the original work, no less?’

The description of him indiscriminately picking fights and taking lives flashed through my mind.

‘He’s quite cute, actually.’

I pulled at the ribbon tying the box while looking at Lucas’s reddened ears. I had thought he might have come to pick a fight, given how abruptly he showed up.

‘He’s just embarrassed, I see.’

Coming to give a gift after arguing with me yesterday must mean it’s an apology. It seemed that I, being the adult, should let it slide.

Inside the box he gave me was a storybook with illustrations.

“I heard you like storybooks.”

“The title is ‘The Chronicle of Cassian’?”

“Even if it’s a storybook, shouldn’t you read something useful for life?”

“The Chronicle of Cassian is useful…”

I hadn’t expected to receive this as a gift.

An unfamiliar emotion, somewhat empty yet tickling my heart, washed over me.

‘He probably doesn’t know.’

As I hesitated on how to react, Sen stepped in for me. She put her hand on my shoulder and exclaimed in a loud voice.

“The Grand Princess seems to really like the gift!”

“Well, of course.”

“Thank you for giving a gift to the Grand Princess.”

“I just gave it as a return gift.”

“She seems to like it so much, she can’t take her eyes off the gift.”

Contrary to Sen’s explanation, my feelings were not simply happy, but rather quite complex.

‘I’m not unhappy, but it’s also a bit bitter.’

If I had to describe it, it might be like directly witnessing a black history that had been recorded. After all, Cassian was me in my thirtieth life.

It felt even stranger because Lucas looked proud of giving me a storybook depicting myself.

“Why does your expression look like that?”

“Huh? What about my expression? Thank you for the gift, Lucas.”

“I’ve finished my business, so I’ll be going now.”

“Okay. Take care.”

As Lucas was about to leave with a relieved face, Sen blocked his way.

“Young Master Lucas. The Grand Princess doesn’t know how to read perfectly yet.”

“And?”

“The other maids and I have a large-scale laundry task today, so we’ll be away.”

What laundry?

As far as I knew, Sen and the maids’ afternoon schedule was completely empty.

‘And I can read well.’

As I was about to tell Lucas the truth, I was forcibly silenced by another maid who grabbed me.

“Mmph?!”

Lucas hesitated at Sen’s suggestion to read the storybook to me. After pondering with a troubled face, he eventually nodded.

“If it’s just reading to her.”

I witnessed a flash of satisfaction cross Sen’s face.

***

Lucas kept his word. He sat me down next to him and calmly read the storybook.

“Cassian decided to turn the Battle of Malenka around using the palace guards.”

“Um, Lucas?”

“Is there a problem with the content?”

I silently pointed at Lucas’s eyes with my finger.

Lucas rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand and looked surprised at the tears on it. He seemed to have been so focused on reading that he didn’t even realize he was crying.

Seeing his eyes welling up with tears again as soon as he wiped them, I asked.

“Why are you crying at this part?”

The Battle of Malenka, which he had just read about, was recorded in history as a great victory. Lucas furrowed his sharp eyes and answered.

“In the next scene, Cassian dies.”

“Cassian?”

Lucas dropped tears again at my question.

‘He looks like he wouldn’t cry even if pricked with a needle!’

Lucas dropped tears again at my question.

‘He looks like he wouldn’t cry even if pricked with a needle!’

Even his crying face exuded such beauty that it made me feel like I had done something wrong. Unable to overcome the guilt, I did my best to come up with words to comfort him.

“Lucas, all people die.”

“Cassian was a hero. But she received nothing in return.”

“Didn’t she earn a lot of money and become a noble?”

“She spent her time moving from one battlefield to another without even getting a chance to use the money she received.”

You know surprisingly well.

When I lived as Cassian, I received a year’s worth of income from when I was a merchant just in reward money.

“When the war ends, I’ll spend a comfortable retirement. ”

I held onto such hope even while knowing that hunting dogs are discarded after the hunt is over. The time of disposal came earlier than expected, and I didn’t even get to use the gold coins.

‘It is a shame.’

I heard that after I died, the remaining assets were appropriated by the state. It was enough to make me go crazy and jump around in frustration.

After sniffling for a while, Lucas continued reading the storybook.

“Although all the allies were on the verge of annihilation, Cassian didn’t give up. She decided to break down the castle gate alone.”

“It must have been desperate then.”

“Her courage brought a great victory.”

The storybook ended with a picture of Cassian laughing with the soldiers.

Countless nights of cursing reality and crying, comrades who died and disappeared. It was too beautiful an ending to capture all of that.

Still, it wasn’t a bad feeling to hear our story in the voice of a distant future generation.

“Thank you, Lucas.”

“There’s no need to thank me. It’s just a small token of appreciation for what you gave me.”

“Not for that. I used to think Cassian’s death was a bit meaningless.”

At the mention of Cassian, Lucas’s eyes gleamed. His transparent eyes, sparkling with expectation, were as beautiful as brilliant jewels.

“There’s no such thing as a meaningless death.”

At the time of death, I felt wronged.

I felt wronged that despite struggling so hard to live, I ended up being used and killed. But here was a child crying for me in a later generation.

It felt like the lingering regret that had been etched in my heart was finally being washed away.

“Did you know about Cassian even before reading the storybook?”

“What about it?”

“It’s been bothering me. You even know the shape of the bow Cassian developed. Are you perhaps…”

Lucas closed the storybook and grasped my hands.

I blinked, letting him hold my hands, overwhelmed by Lucas’s intensity. Despite being rough with calluses and scars, his hands were warm.

I was dumbfounded by Lucas’s next words.

“Are you also a fan of Cassian?”

“A fan of who?”

“A fan of Cassian, I mean.”

“Lucas, do you perhaps like Cassian?”

Lucas’s head nodded vigorously up and down in affirmation.

‘The mid-boss from the original work is my fan.’

Even though I thought it could be possible, I just couldn’t believe it. In that era of frequent wars, there were as many as five Sword Masters.

To claim to be a fan of me, a minor one among them.

I, who was treated as an oddity wherever I went because there were so few female knights at the time. Unable to believe it, I asked him blankly.

“Why do you like her? Because she was the first female Sword Master?”

“Because she’s someone who never gave up and persevered to achieve her goals.”

A face of genuine admiration.

The expression that had looked cold, befitting the Grand Duke’s second child, melted away. To think one could make such an expression just because they liked someone.

‘He’s so handsome it’s dazzling.’

I reflexively raised my hand to cover my eyes, then smiled softly along with him. It was because I suddenly remembered Lucas as described in the original work.

[Even allies feared the mad dog. No one understood him, obsessed only with strength.]

To think that you would understand me.

I felt certain that I could get along well with him after today’s events.

“Thank you for liking Cassian.”

“I look forward to our future, comrade.”

Lucas shook our clasped hands back and forth.

‘What’s with comrade?’

Does he mean we’re comrades in liking Cassian together? I was startled for a moment but soon forgot about the title.

However, before long, I realized what ‘Cassian comrade’ meant to Lucas. Lucas liked Cassian even more than I had thought.

“According to scholars, Cassian was likely left-handed but often used her right hand.”

“Uh-huh.”

“What do you think?”

To bring up such a topic with a serious face as soon as day breaks!

My quivering lips had been twitching for a while now. He said he came because the Grand Duke told him to visit me, but I wonder.

It seemed that the strategy to gain Lucas’s favor had succeeded in an unexpected direction.