I Will End My 10-Year Unrequited Love - Chapter 93

“I will save him, even if it means I have to die again.”

“But you resent him, don’t you? I recall you saying that being alive is hell. Do you wish he could feel the same pain that only living brings?”

Nielsen had to collect his thoughts several times to understand Elia’s words. He couldn’t quite grasp what deep feelings she held in her heart toward Cyrone. Was it still love? Or was it hatred or resentment…?

The sunset was beginning. A dark crimson light seeped through the window, painting the sky with a mysterious hue that only appears at this hour.

“At last, the sun is setting.”

Elia said, staring out the window instead of answering directly. Where the sun breathed its last, a gentle darkness spread.

“Yes, soon it will be completely dark.”

Nielsen murmured, also gazing outside. The day was truly coming to an end. The darkness that would swallow Elia was now drawing near.

“I love this sky that can only be seen at this hour. Father used to say darkness chases away the light, but I never thought so.”

Startled by Elia’s sudden words, Nielsen turned to look at her. Her gaze remained fixed beyond the borderlands. Her pale green eyes shimmered with an indescribable light.

“It’s as if light and darkness are blending into each other, a sky that exists only at this moment.”

Elia reached out her hand toward the air, trying to grasp the light, but caught only an empty breeze.

“How much they must long for each other to have such a desperate color.”

Elia murmured, lost in thought. Nielsen quietly watched her. After a moment, Elia composed herself and looked at Nielsen.

“One day, I want to show Cyrone that sky too.”

At her unexpected words, Nielsen’s expression went blank. But Elia’s face grew calm, as if she had made peace with everything.

“Just like the pain that only life can bring, there is also happiness that only living can teach.”

A subtle glow settled over one side of Elia’s face. Without realizing it, Nielsen frowned. It felt as if a holy flame, heralding the return of a saint, was illuminating her.

“I hope he will come to understand it all. How the sky changes color with each hour, how happy it is to hold a loved one close, how precious and beautiful a child who looks like him can be, which flowers bloom in the fields as the seasons change, and what sounds the wind makes when it shifts…”

Nielsen stared blankly at Elia for a moment before finally speaking.

“So, you mean that despite everything, you want him to live happily. I hadn’t expected that. I thought you would resent His Highness.”

“Yes, I do resent him. But even so, I want him to live happily.”

As the sky darkened further, the end was drawing near. It was time to accept that all the myriad emotions Elia felt toward him stemmed from one single truth. With a calm expression, Elia said,

“In the end, it means I still love Cyrone.”

For a moment, Nielsen was speechless, frozen as if caught off guard. Though he wanted to let her go with a neutral face, he found himself unable even to force a smile.

Love. What could it be, that it lies at the root of so many emotions? Why is it that every feeling in the world somehow boils down to love? Nielsen tilted his head in puzzlement, chasing a faint, elusive afterimage.

“So, you’re saying even resentment is ultimately love. That’s quite difficult for me to understand.”

“Hate and resentment toward Cyrone are feelings I wouldn’t have felt if I hadn’t loved him in the first place. Yes, everything after all is because I love him.”

“…”

Nielsen looked at Elia with a puzzled look. Elia merely averted her gaze and smiled softly.

“So, I guess that’s what they call love.”

Nielsen quietly nodded. The sharpness in his eyes had softened into calmness.

“Everyone has regrets about their past. Moments they wish to undo and moments they must face. His Highness could have gone back to the beginning and changed everything. Saved the Empress, struck down Duke Reiffers earlier, or even abandoned everything and fled.”

Nielsen gazed silently at Elia. Like the merging of light and darkness forming a single hue in the sky, it seemed as if Cyrone and Elia themselves were overlapping.

“Of course, he could have chosen not to meet you at all.”

“…”

“But he didn’t. I never understood why, no matter how much I thought about it. So I asked you.”

Now, with a satisfied look, Nielsen seemed to have resolved some of his doubts.

“And you made the same choice as His Highness. You did not avoid meeting him at the start, but to wish for his survival even if it meant your own death…”