Chapter 34
“Just…”
Lynette lifted her head. Seeing his angry face for the first time made her chest ache a little. She had vowed never to make him sad, and yet now she had made him angry instead.
Why was it so difficult to become nothing more than someone who could stir no feelings at all in this man?
“I dislike Your Highness.”
Saying words she didn’t mean turned out to be easier than expected. Easier, even, than telling him to “love another woman.” It slipped from her lips so simply that it startled her.
Ah. I’ve already told this same lie once before.
When she left him before her regression, she had said the same thing.
How could she ever forget the look of shock on Euphen’s face? As if he might burst into tears at any moment…
Thinking that far, Lynette blinked at the expression before her. Different from back then. The Crown Prince’s face was hard, stiff. If anything, he looked angrier.
“You dislike me?”
“…Yes.”
“Then how pitiful it must be for you, to have to see such a hateful man every single day.”
The mocking words made her shoulders jolt.
She hadn’t expected that kind of response. What had changed? Euphen then and Euphen now were surely the same person.
Up until today, he had certainly been the ‘Euphen’ she knew. The gentle man, who always greeted her with a smile, the man she had once loved with her whole life.
But the man before her now… he was someone else. A stranger wearing Euphen’s shell.
“Your Highness.”
She stepped back.
This wasn’t the man she knew. This twisted smile was from someone she had never met before.
“Lynette. As you said, you are my Guide.”
He stepped closer. Lynette staggered back without meaning to, but his large hand gripped her arm firmly. Even through the fabric, faint pain seeped in.
“Even if you call yourself fake, your role is still to guide me. You can’t escape it, no matter what.”
“Hh…!”
It was pain she could usually endure without trouble, and yet a small whimper slipped between her teeth. Euphen took another step closer.
“You said you dislike me, didn’t you.”
She blinked slowly.
What was he trying to say?
His grip on her arm tightened. She couldn’t tell if the throbbing pain came from the strain of Guiding, or from his fingers digging into her flesh.
The man lowered his head, leaning close to her ear. His rough breath grazed her skin.
“Make sure that feeling doesn’t change.”
What did that mean?
Her head spun dizzily. Euphen straightened, having whispered those threatening words.
“Eshar, was it?”
His lips twisted into a crooked smile.
“I’d like to meet her.”
Even amid her confusion, her heart dropped heavily at those words.
“If love is what you want, then I’ll give it.”
As he said so, Euphen’s blue eyes bore straight into Lynette’s.
***
She left the detached palace feeling as though she were in a dream. On her way to the place she had promised to meet Sillian each day, she tried to organize her thoughts, but they only grew more tangled.
Confused.
That single word wasn’t nearly enough to describe the storm of thoughts inside her.
Lynette stopped in her tracks and pressed her throbbing forehead with her fingertips.
Today she had seen a different side of Euphen for the first time. She couldn’t be sure which one was his true face.
Had he been hiding it all this time? For years, even?
A small sigh slipped from her lips.
‘I don’t know.’
No matter how much she thought, she wouldn’t find the answer. How could she possibly know the entirety of that man’s heart?
After a moment of agonized thought, she shook her head, casting away the confusion. Either way, she had gotten past the worst of it, and that was enough.
Since he said he’d meet Eshar… it’s good. This is good.
Whether or not he treated her differently than before didn’t matter. Whether he mocked or threatened her, what did it matter?
If anything, if he grew to hate her, things might actually go more smoothly. That way, at least, she wouldn’t feel sorrow when it came time to leave. The knowledge that Euphen would never miss her might even be a comfort.
“Haa.”
She lifted her head and let out a long sigh.
She told herself it was for the best. Whether it really was, she couldn’t be certain.
All she could hope was that Eshar would awaken soon, and that she and Euphen would come together. Then, perhaps, all these tangled feelings would neatly unravel.
As Lynette quietly lowered her gaze to her hands, a large one suddenly reached out in front of her, taking hers.
She knew who it was at a glance, just by the back of the hand. Ever since that sudden midnight visit, she had made it a point to meet him every day, to make sure nothing like that happened again.
“Sillian.”
“You’ve just come back from guiding the Prince, haven’t you?”
His palm felt faintly warm against hers.
She still wasn’t used to another person’s warmth. Perhaps because there was no one else in her life she could touch this way.
The only man she loved, the one she longed to touch… she could feel nothing but pain from him. And yet, contact with another man brought her such peace. Why was that?
Red eyes gazed steadily down at Lynette. She wasn’t sure how long had passed before she tried to pull her hand free.
“That’s enough. Let go.”
“Why do you wear such an expression?”
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