Chapter 35
Lonely? Me?
For Hyun, the warmth of human affection and deep bonds had never been allowed since childhood.
He had to learn to use everything around him properly.
From the moment he could walk on his own, people were always chess pieces—pieces he needed to know how to use skillfully.
Who in their right mind would genuinely exchange feelings with a chess piece?
Hyun knew how to present himself as others wanted. Winning people’s favor and subtly steering them to act as he wished was an easy matter.
During his days as an executive, to some, Hyun was a ruthless bastard without blood or tears. To others, a kind neighbor and colleague.
He had been a strict but fair superior at times, and a polite junior at others.
Yet in all those relationships, the real Lee Hyun was never there.
There was only the version of Lee Hyun others expected or the Lee Hyun who controlled others.
It was only after discarding that sturdy armor and donning someone else’s mask that the true human inside, longing desperately for connection—not for position or power, but for someone to love him—was visible, even briefly.
Hyun’s true self appeared only for an instant, but for someone who wanted to capture every moment, that fleeting glimpse could never be missed.
Though they’d known each other for less than half a year, Misha, like any boy in love, was both innocent and relentless.
Misha the person might have had a soft, childish side, but as a predator, Mikhail seemed born knowing how to drive his prey.
So it was only natural that Hyun, who knew how to handle people but not how to be loved, would find his heart slowly soaked, like clothes in a gentle rain.
Misha would stay at the Ice Lake for just under a week each month with his master before returning to the palace. If Hyun sent a letter to the palace, it would be two weeks before a reply arrived.
Every time Misha filled Hyun’s shabby old mansion with things he’d brought, Hyun felt more afraid of growing dependent on him—but also grateful.
Now, Hyun had nothing left.
If he were still the CEO Lee Hyun, he would have suspected this kindness was just another trick to take something from him.
But for a condemned man, with death drawing nearer every day, there was nothing left to lose, nothing left to protect.
If God had led him here to be comforted in his last days, that wasn’t such a bad fate.
If God truly existed, Hyun would surely go to hell after death, for repaying grace with betrayal.
“When the sun rises, it’ll fall down anyway.”
When Hyun brushed the messy snow from Misha’s hair, Misha shook his head like a puppy and answered,
“But if that happens, a pile of snow might fall on your head, Duke.”
He was referring to how, on days like this with heavy snowfall, Hyun only went out to the greenhouse in the afternoon.
“Still, there’s no need for you to wear yourself out from such an early hour.”
“It’s better than being lazy from the start of the day.”
He really never lost a single exchange.
Hyun gave a faint smile and set out the breakfast he almost never touched anymore for Misha.
Misha was startled at first and firmly refused, but at Hyun’s excuse, he reluctantly picked up his spoon.
The excuse was that eating breakfast now only made his stomach uneasy and spoiled the start of his day—a fact that was increasingly true.
As he felt his body grow weaker with each passing day, Hyun cherished his time with Misha all the more.
“You’re leaving at three in the afternoon, right?”
At Hyun’s question, Misha gave a slight start and replied,
“Yes. That’s when we’ll be leaving.”
“Then, when will you be coming next?”
Mikhail held his breath for a moment before answering.
“Probably around the middle of next month.”
“I see.”
The Duke added nothing more.
He could have asked them to stay longer, or to bring something next time, but each time, he simply waited for Misha’s visit as if he were just an onlooker.
Whenever he saw Hyun like this, Mikhail’s heart ached as if under a curse, but there was nothing he could do.
Making Hyun wait for him every day, even if it left him lonely until his last breath, was still better than leaving him all alone.
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