Chapter 41
‘If he were too ordinary, I might occasionally fail to recognize him and walk right past him. But if I made an effort to look for him, it would probably be fine.’
In any case, Felix’s face had never been what drew Abel’s interest. That wasn’t to say he disliked Felix’s appearance now, of course.
Once he had fallen in love with Felix, he had come to love everything about him.
But the reason Abel had truly begun to notice Felix in the first place was not his face—it was Felix’s contradictory yet deeply responsible nature.
“I liked the fact that, even though you disliked me, and even though you wanted nothing from me, you still did what you believed you ought to do.”
It did not matter if Felix had only acted that way because Gregory had ordered him to.
At the time, that was how Abel had perceived and accepted Felix’s actions, and now, no matter what Felix did, Abel loved him all the same.
In truth, the reason Abel had fallen in love with Felix was not something that could be summed up so simply.
What he had just said was merely a tiny fragment of the year that had led him to love Felix.
Before returning to the past, that year they had spent together had itself been a journey toward loving Felix.
‘But I can’t tell Felix about the past.’
It wasn’t because of some rule forbidding him from speaking of the future.
If he were to tell Felix that he had turned back time, or that he had undergone Father’s trial, Felix would think he was insane.
Even now, Felix occasionally looked at him as though he were not entirely sane. If Felix ever concluded that Abel was truly mad, then from that point on, he would never again take anything Abel said seriously.
‘If I tell him I love him because of a time he doesn’t even remember, he’ll never accept my love.’
And so, all Abel could offer were these vague, limited explanations.
“If I had to put it simply, I suppose I like your twisted personality.”
But it seemed that Abel’s sincerity did not reach Felix all that well.
“Don’t you think your tastes are a little too strange?”
That was harsh.
After that, Abel tried several more times to explain why he liked Felix’s twisted personality, but it did little to help.
‘I like the way you look at me as if I’m annoying.’
‘The way you recoil whenever I so much as touch you, too.’
‘It’s amusing how you plaster on a fake smile while thinking you hate me to death.’
‘And even the way you try to hide it but eventually lose your temper is adorable.’
In the end, Felix concluded that, no matter how he looked at it, Abel simply had bizarre tastes.
‘But he really is adorable.’
After a brief silence, Felix looked at Abel with a weary expression.
“So what did you mean when you said you have no other engagements today?”
Felix had deftly changed the subject, preventing Abel from talking further about him. Abel merely shrugged.
“Yesterday’s events made me too famous. The higher-ups have things they need to discuss among themselves, and I’m sure the Temple has plenty it wants to gain from its guests as well.”
“…I’ve thought this before, but you really have no interest in that sort of thing at all, do you, Lord Abel?”
“They place everything in my hands without me having to seize it myself.”
Since he wasn’t particularly inconvenienced, was there really any need to struggle to obtain even more?
“If you acted directly, you’d possess far more than you do now.”
“I probably would. But I’d also have a lot more work to do.”
Felix looked at Abel as though he finally understood.
“So you’re simply too bothered to deal with it all.”
Abel couldn’t deny it.
Because it was true.
“That’s right. But I think I’ll start making a few moves now.”
“…”
“Because I found out that you waver when it comes to my power, Felix—”
“I heard you the first time, so please stop.”
Felix seemed somehow more resolute than before. Has he become more at ease? Abel studied him silently, and Felix shot him a sidelong glance before asking,
“So, did you properly offer a prayer for Count Reynald?”
Who’s Reynald…? Ah.
“So you did understand what I was asking?”
“Yes.”
Felix did not seem to have any intention of hiding the fact that he had understood. Then why had he pretended otherwise back then?
Narrowing his eyes, Abel asked:
“Then why didn’t you tell me at the time?”
Felix looked at him as though he found the question absurd.
“You truly didn’t remember? Then what about the prayer?”
If I already knew, why would I ask you for the count’s name?
But rather than saying that, Abel needed to make it clear that he had not broken his promise.
“I prayed for every count on the continent.”
Under Felix’s unwavering stare, Abel declared confidently,
“Why? I kept my promise, didn’t I?”
“Does it really work that way?”
Why wouldn’t it?
“I wouldn’t know. Even if I offer the prayer, whether it’s answered or not is up to Father.”
In the first place, Abel merely offered prayers on others’ behalf; he was hardly in a position to tell Father what to do.
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