Chapter 271
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.
I didn’t just enjoy lyrical writing. I liked history books as well. Because of that, I knew very well that in those eras, there were very few kings or nobles lucky enough to survive into adulthood and then die as celebrated heroes.
And to be honest, I said those things deliberately, just to get on his nerves. I didn’t like Rupert either.
“You’re just jealous of me, aren’t you?”
“If you need someone to envy you, go play with someone else. I’m begging you.”
There were plenty of noble children our age staying at our estate for the summer. As the future Marquis—and a count from the moment he was born—Rupert would have had no trouble finding people eager to flatter him or envy him, just to satisfy his constant hunger for validation.
And yet, I couldn’t understand why he insisted on dragging only me—who was always indifferent—to fish with him by the stream.
“As if you’d have anyone to talk to without me…”
Rupert didn’t keep me company because he saw me as a friend. Looking back now, I think it was simply because I was the only one he could bare his thoughts to completely, without fear that I’d exploit his weaknesses.
“But in times of peace, a man can’t make a name for himself.”
“That’s only because you read nothing but military history.”
I like history books, but I dislike war histories. I hate all killing that isn’t done to survive. Every form of slaughter for its own sake.
That’s why I actually hated fishing, too, even as a pastime. Anything that got caught on my hook, I always released.
“Hmm… it took the bait…”
When I pulled it up, it turned out to be a sea bass so large it exceeded the length of my forearm. As I carefully removed the hook from its mouth, Rupert stared at it with open envy before asking,
“How heavy is it?”
“I don’t know. About three pounds, maybe.”
“Looks heavier than that. Let me try lifting it.”
If I handed it over, he’d immediately toss it into his bucket and later lie to everyone that he’d caught it himself. It wasn’t the first or second time.
Dana, does it sound like I’m dredging up irrelevant childhood memories just to slander your husband?
That’s not what this is.
This is why we ended up the way we are now.
Someone who would snatch away anything I caught. Do you really think he only stole fish?
In any case, knowing his nature all too well, I quickly released the sea bass back into the stream. As I watched it disappear safely into the current, I heard a mutter behind me.
“Coward.”
No matter how many times I told him that hating killing and being a coward were not the same thing, he never understood. He often branded me as one regardless.
“You should’ve been born a girl.”
“Then I’d have had to marry you.”
“Tch, disgusting. Ptooh.”
“Agreed.”
That should be enough to explain what kind of relationship Rupert and I had.
Anyway, that day too, we were heading back empty-handed. Just as we were nearly out of the forest, I noticed something white lying by the narrow path.
It was a parasol—a woman’s.
For a moment, I feared something terrible had happened to a woman walking the forest alone. I looked around, but there were no signs of people or animals anywhere.
Thinking she might have slipped and fallen into the stream beside the path, I peered down the slope—
And in that instant, I was the one who lost my footing and fell off the course of my life.
A girl stood there on the steep incline, clutching a branch of forget-me-nots that had bloomed late in the season, balanced precariously.
Because I met you.
I’ve told you before. About the day we first met, on our first outing together in Eisenthal, and how I fell in love with you at first sight. You might think you already know this story and don’t need to hear it again, but please, listen anyway.
That spring day felt like a blessing, yet I believed my love to be a sin. Like a guilty man confessing in shame, I told the story briefly and stopped there, without realizing that my silence was the greater sin.
I’ve regretted it deeply ever since. I may never have another chance to say this. So please—please listen.
It was the moment our eyes met for the first time.
In the dark forest, where the canopy overhead cast deep shadows, a single shaft of light fell down.
Straight onto you.
It was as though God Himself had pointed at you with a shining finger, declaring that you were my fate.
To be honest, the thought that it was a revelation only came to me later.
At that moment, my very first thought was something else entirely.
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