Please Forget Me - Chapter 298

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.

“They say that after looking at nothing but men who resemble freshly dug potatoes from the fields, seeing you makes their hearts feel cleansed. Of course, it doesn’t seem to make them particularly pious. Honestly, judging by what my colleagues say, the one who ought to worry about being attacked isn’t me—it’s you, Father.”

“……”

“Oh, listen to me, saying something so vulgar to a priest.”

Back then, you had no idea that the priest who looked so pure was, in truth, a thoroughly worldly man.

“I’m sorry. I emptied a canteen before coming here.”

“I see…”

So that was it, you’d called me because you were drunk.

“It’s fine. I wasn’t offended.”

“But God might be offended, don’t you think? I’ve insulted His most cherished messenger.”

“God doesn’t cherish me at all—”

I was about to say that, but my words hitched when you suddenly smiled demurely and traced the sign of the cross.

“Please forgive all my sins.”

You were treating it as confession. so that God would have no grounds to hold your words against you.

“…In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, your sins are forgiven.”

“Amen.”

The way you beamed after receiving absolution was unbearably lovely. In forgiving your sins, I had committed my own.

“By the way…”

You stopped smiling and stared straight at me before saying,

“You really look a lot alike, and yet you don’t.”

There was no need to ask whom you meant. The mention of Rupert sent my mood plunging back into the abyss.

“You seem like clear water, Father. The kind that makes you want to dip your hand in it. But you don’t, because you’re afraid it’ll get dirty. Do you know what I mean?”

“…Doesn’t that just mean I feel distant? Arrogant, perhaps…?”

“It’s easy to want to get closer to you, but hard to actually approach. Still, that’s not arrogance.”

“……”

“The arrogant one is Rupert. He’s… not someone everyone can easily like. Ah, I really must be drunk. Please keep that secret too.”

That was the first time I realized you didn’t see your fiance as nothing but lovable.

“Thank you and I’m sorry. I wish you a peaceful night.”

“And I wish you the same, Miss Loveridge.”

About an hour later, I walked you as far as the cathedral’s front gate. I planned to stay there until you safely entered the nurses’ quarters beside the hospital. Just as you were leaving, you suddenly turned back and said,

“Thank you for the parasol. It’s something I treasure, and I was upset when I lost it. I should have thanked you sooner.”

A parasol?

As far as I knew, the only parasol you might thank me for was the one you’d left behind the very first time we met—ten years ago.

I never imagined you would still remember that incident. Let alone remember that I was the one who returned it to you.

It felt as though someone had struck my head and chest with a hammer. I remember standing there long after you disappeared into your quarters, unable to move.

That night, I thought you’d only called me because you were drunk. I assumed you wouldn’t come again. Truthfully, part of me hoped you wouldn’t. My own feelings had begun to frighten me.

Tap. Tap.

“Father, I’m here.”

But you knocked on my window the next night, and the night after that.

You weren’t drunk when you arrived. You became drunk after you came. I began to worry about you, drinking and smoking every night.

“Is something troubling you?”

“Isn’t living itself a form of suffering?”

That might be true for me, but it shouldn’t be for you.

“If you were a Marchioness, surely your suffering would lessen.”

If Rupert couldn’t give you a better life, then my decision to give you up had no meaning at all.

“I just can’t sleep well. It’s not because something terrible happened. I’ve always had trouble falling asleep since I was young. I appreciate your concern, but there’s really nothing to worry about. You don’t secretly wish I’d stop coming here, do you?”

“Not at all. I simply wonder why you chose this place.”

“There are too many eyes at the quarters. Smoking and drinking are everyday things for the other nurses, but for someone who’s supposed to become a Marchioness, they’re weaknesses. I only had one canteen and went to bed properly. But once rumors start spreading, I turn into some legendary drunk overnight.”

You gave a bitter smile, then suddenly crossed yourself.

“Please forgive my sins.”

Another unexpected confession.

And in confession, a priest is never allowed to reveal what is said.