Chapter 116
“What exactly did you tell the Duke about our family? Thanks to you, our mines were confiscated, and Blashur snatched away every merchant guild we did business with. Ha. You must be thrilled, having such a powerful husband. Life is just blooming for you now that you’re the Duchess, isn’t it?”
Thud. My back hit the door. There was still some distance between us, but unless I somehow disappeared, he was going to catch me.
I should have just gone into the washroom. God, why didn’t I just go in? There might have been someone inside! I could have asked for help! My panic had prevented any rational thought, and that was the real problem.
Could I jump from the terrace? No, going onto the terrace was too dangerous. I wasn’t fast enough; Lane would catch me easily, and then we’d be trapped out there, just the two of us. It was probably better to hold my ground here and pray someone would come.
Taking quick, shallow breaths, I tried to stall for time, forcing the words out.
“Why… why did you come… to find me?”
Please, please, let someone come. Please. How absurd. I had just pushed Daykin away into the crowd, and now I was desperately crying out for him in my mind. How shameless.
Lane let out a hollow laugh. “Ah, look at me. My mistake, my mistake. I got a little carried away. I’m not really in a good state right now, you see. Ah, yes, the reason I came to see you, sister.”
“Not in a good state,” he’d said. Was it because the Duke was seizing their assets? Or had Father beaten him? That was certainly plausible.
Father was always quick to raise his hand when something displeased him. With me gone, the twins would have naturally become his new targets. His standard for “satisfactory” always seemed absolute, but it was ultimately relative.
You need someone to fail to make another’s success stand out. With me gone, the bar would have been raised. Lane and Lizzy would have been constantly compared, and whoever fell even slightly behind would have been beaten or scolded.
Lane reached past me and grabbed the handle of the door I was blocking.
“I came to apologize for what I did in the past. I was so very sorry back then, you know?”
“…What?”
Apologize? Here? Now? With that attitude?
A crimson light glinted in Lane’s eyes. I knew that look well. It was the look he got when he was displeased by my lack of immediate obedience. He grabbed my wrist roughly, so hard I nearly cried out in pain.
“Hmm, I can’t very well apologize properly out here. Why don’t we just talk on the terrace?”
“No, I don’t… ah!”
The worst-case scenario had arrived. He gripped my wrist tightly and dragged me forcibly onto the terrace. The door shut behind us, and the curtain was drawn. I was trembling violently, whether from the cold night air or the learned terror that gripped my entire body, I couldn’t tell.
Just as my legs gave out, I saw something. With my wrist captured, I hadn’t been able to see it clearly before. Or perhaps it had been visible, and I’d just been too frantic to escape to notice.
‘That can’t be…’
I could see small fissures in Lane’s body, the same size as the ones I’d seen on Father. The only difference was that Father’s had been clumped together like a ball of yarn, while every single one of Lane’s was shattered.
“You… you…”
I had assumed his terrible state was due to our father’s abuse. But now I saw that wasn’t it. The raw scratches on his cheeks, the unfocused gaze, the hand that trembled even as it crushed my wrist…
I had no desire to mend those fissures for him. But at this close range, I still couldn’t control the ability leaking from me. Against my will, my power flowed out, and Lane’s body began, bit by bit, to heal.
My head spun. Using my power on Father had never caused such dizziness. I must have overexerted myself today. This was how I learned: my ability couldn’t handle two people in one day.
Lane let out a strangled laugh. Why was he in a state just short of a full-blown rampage?
He wasn’t surprised as his condition returned to normal. In fact, he looked as though he had expected it. A manic grin spread across his face as he looked down, surveying his own body.
“Ah, yes. This is it. This. Keuk, keuk-keuk!”
‘He said he’d been looking for me… He meant to use me!’
But for that to be true, he would have had to know I possessed this calming ability. How did he know? Since when? I hadn’t even properly understood it. Had he known all this time and just pretended not to? Had he knowingly feigned ignorance during all those years of hell?
I tried to rip my wrist from his grasp, but he only clamped down harder. The pain, even from just this, brought tears to my eyes. It seemed my short time in a peaceful place had softened me.
Shamefully, I couldn’t bring myself to resist properly. I was already terrified of what would happen if I wasn’t docile. When we were young, Lane had never hit me, but as we grew older, he had begun to resemble Father, treating me more and more roughly.
I was terrified by my complete helplessness. If I screamed, he would hit me. He might have people waiting just outside the terrace. Or there might be no one at all who could help me. I couldn’t bear to take that risk.
The right thing to do was to run, even if it meant taking a blow. But my body, frozen in fear, refused. This was the terrifying power of learned helplessness.
A minute that felt like an hour passed. Finally, Lane released me. A bruise was already forming on my wrist. Blood rushed back into my fingers with a painful tingle.
“All that nonsense about you having some special ability… it was true, wasn’t it?”
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