The Beast That Licks Me - Chapter 4.9

Rosette collapsed onto the bed. Though her body wasn’t tired, her mind was exhausted. She reached over to the nightstand and grabbed the notes. They were notes Evan had left behind. Most were messages telling her to eat dinner first because he would be late. Today’s note was similar, but it had a drawing of a crying puppy on it, suggesting he felt sorry.

“His handwriting is excellent, but his drawing is really bad…”

Rosette stroked the note for a long while before putting it down.

“I have so much to tell you.”

Rosette closed her eyes and recalled one by one the things she wanted to tell Evan.

I’ve agreed to teach Silvia for the academy entrance exam. All those years preparing for the entrance exam were worthwhile after all. I thought it was meaningless, but it actually had purpose. I hope Silvia can study what she loves to her heart’s content. But I do feel a bit jealous. I can’t show such emotions to others. That’s why I wanted to talk to you about it today.

I also met Yvonne. She gave me money? And jewelry too. I wondered what it feels like to be betrayed by someone you love, and today I think I understand a little. Of course, this is a secret from Yvonne. She would be angry if I told her. I don’t dislike her anymore.

Laub keeps making advances lately. He keeps asking me to become his one. I can’t tell if he’s joking or serious. Ariel just wants me to have a meal with him. I’ve never accepted, but if you stay away too long, I might go eat with him. … That’s a lie.

Sometimes I feel someone watching me. I thought it was my imagination, but now I don’t think so. It happened again today. I’m a bit scared. Where on earth are you?

I wondered if you were moving furniture again and looked around the first-class area, but I couldn’t find you anywhere. I try to stay awake until dawn, but you don’t come back even after three o’clock. You’re gone when I wake up early, too. What on earth are you doing? I hate you. When I see you, I’ll hit you first thing. Then I’ll pour out words of resentment.

“….”

The truth is, I just miss you. That time when I fell asleep in your arms feels so distant now.

Rosette buried her face in the pillow, sniffling.

***

“Wow, what’s all this?”

Ariel exclaimed in amazement at the bread and cookies as soon as she entered. Levit likewise opened his eyes wide in surprise.

“Let’s talk while we eat.”

Rosette said with a somewhat smug attitude, pointing to the cookies in front of them. They had expected a test, but bread and cookies instead? There was no reason to decline. Ariel and Levit sat down and picked up cookies.

“Why hasn’t Evan Oppa been coming lately?”

“…Evan is quite busy these days.”

“Oh.”

Her displeasure must have shown while speaking, because after Ariel’s short exclamation, she didn’t ask anything more. Rosette frowned while chewing a hard cookie. Then, she asked suddenly.

“Kids. You’re not doing d***s, are you?”

“What? D***s?”

“Yes. I heard d***s are circulating on the ship lately. I’m sure you wouldn’t, but just in case.”

At Rosette’s words, Levit and Ariel exchanged glances. Before she could notice anything suspicious, both hurried to deny it.

“We don’t do that. Absolutely not.”

“D***s are really expensive. Kids like us can’t afford them.”

“You can’t do it because it’s expensive?”

Rosette asked incredulously. Ariel covered her mouth, seeming to realize her mistake. Rosette narrowed her eyes and began questioning them.

“Tell me everything you know.”

“Well, actually…”

After hesitating, Ariel and Levit gradually began to open up.

Ships were originally the best vehicles for transporting d***s. So although the two had never seen d***s directly, they knew enough to understand that they were being smuggled between continents under the radar.

But this time, an unusually large amount of d***s seemed to be on board. D**g dealers had approached crew members, proposing they sell d***s. The crew members, always looking for ways to make money on the ship, welcomed the proposal enthusiastically. The organization that Levit’s brother belonged to was no exception. Initially, only higher-ups discreetly sold to nobles and the wealthy, but the scale gradually expanded, and now even Levit’s brother was involved in sales.

“They haven’t tried to sell to you?”

“Not to me. I think they thought I might report them because my dad is a crew member.”

“That’s fortunate at least.”

Ariel’s father was a crew member. Crew members were closely connected to security, so while dealers might hide their activities, they wouldn’t ask crew children to sell.

“They haven’t approached me either. I think it’s because my brother has started to distrust me recently, which is actually a good thing.”

Levit said with a bitter smile.

“What do you mean your brother doesn’t trust you?”

“This kid’s nickname these days is ‘traitor.'”

“Ariel.”

“What, it’s true! He’s called a traitor because he’s friendly with you, teacher, and always follows you around saying ‘teacher, teacher.’ I think that’s better. Being a traitor is much better than selling d***s.”

Rosette tilted her head in confusion. What connection could there be between Levit being friendly with her and being called a traitor?

“What does that mean? Can you explain in more detail?”

“It means you’re a good person, teacher.”

“I’m a good person?”

“A righteous person. You save people, you reported a lost wallet to security, and you teach us almost for free. Because of that, they’re wary and don’t give Levit any work.”

“Ah…”

After hearing Ariel’s explanation, it made sense. They were worried that someone who seemed righteous might immediately report them to security.

“For that reason, they don’t completely separate Levit from me?”

“Learning to read and write is useful in many ways. I think that’s why.”

This time Levit answered. Finding it convincing, Rosette nodded.

“I see. If I were to report your brother… it would be troublesome for you, wouldn’t it?”

Levit nodded with a troubled expression. Rosette sighed, holding her forehead. She had thought they were just children, but they were going through such things behind the scenes.

“Even if you reported it, it would only go as far as his brother. It could also be dangerous for you, teacher.”

“Yes, you’re right. You must have had a hard time.”

“…No, not really.”

Levit shook his head and smiled faintly. She had felt that Levit seemed to have grown up recently—was it because of these hardships? She felt sorry for having been proud without knowing.

“But these are really delicious.”

“Yes. I want to eat them every day.”

“Go ahead, eat a lot.”

Rosette pushed her portion of snacks toward the two baby birds eating frantically and fell into thought.

***

After finishing her discussion about Silvia’s academy admission with her husband through a magical device, Jepi began Silvia’s entrance exam studies in earnest. Rosette agreed to help with Silvia’s studies from morning to evening, except for the time she taught Levit and Ariel. Thanks to this, her tutoring fees were quite substantial.

Since she had to study the material in advance at night, Rosette was extremely busy these days. Her under-eyes darkened and her expression became haggard, causing Jepi and Silvia to worry. But Rosette was satisfied with this lifestyle. It meant she thought less about Evan. He seemed to be coming back earlier lately, but “earlier” still meant after three o’clock, so they still couldn’t have a proper conversation.

While she was having a late evening lesson with Silvia, a commotion broke out outside.

“What’s happening? Such disturbances have become frequent lately.”

Rosette wondered. Silvia looked briefly toward the door where the sound came from and said.

“It’s probably related to d***s.”

“Huh?”

“I heard that security has been cracking down on d**g users recently.”

“Ah…”

She had heard warnings about d***s several times, but she never thought she would experience it so tangibly. Once again, a dull impact sound followed by someone’s scream was heard. Rosette and Silvia simultaneously squeezed their eyes shut. As the noise subsided, Rosette asked in a worried voice.

“I wonder if your mother is alright?”

“Mother’s tea party is not in that direction, so she should be fine.”

Recently, Jepi had been shamelessly attending tea parties to gather information about Silvia’s entrance exams. Initially, she had been exhausted to the point of collapse, but recently she had been enjoying herself after meeting a few like-minded people. The etiquette education related to tea parties that Rosette had additionally provided also played a part.

“I see. That’s a relief.”

After staring at the relieved Rosette for a while, Silvia opened her mouth.

“…Um, teacher.”

“Yes?”

“They say that when studying science at the academy I’m aiming for, you also learn how to make high-purity d***s.”

“Where did you hear that?”

“From a magazine. Mother showed me.”

Silvia pointed to a mountain of magazines piled on one side of the table.

“Hmm, since you’ll be studying science in depth, you might learn about that.”

Rosette spoke casually. Silvia, uncharacteristically hesitant, asked.

“What if I become that kind of person later?”