Chapter 201
But this man—this relationship—was different. Unlike the clean, dry breaks of her past, this one clung like something sticky, something that refused to let go.
I wanted to touch him, to feel him, to connect with him on a deeper level. Only then did I understand the hollow ache I’d never known before—the gnawing, consuming sensation.
If I were to part with this man, it would hurt more than any goodbye I’d ever endured.
If this man betrayed me, the wound would cut deeper than any pain I’d felt before.
‘I don’t want to lose him.’
Confronting her own raw feelings, Jaha let out a sigh and splashed cold water on her face. No matter how she felt, she couldn’t afford to fall into confirmation bias.
Hands trembling, Jaha scribbled down the worst-case scenarios onto paper.
Emperor = Rikanan
The moment that thing—the one she didn’t even want to picture in her mind—took shape before her eyes, her breath caught in her throat.
Jaha took a deep, steadying breath and forced herself to list the rest.
㉠->㉡->The Emperor uses magic to summon my present self back into this world -> He’s deceiving me, altering his appearance to hide his identity.
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- But why go through all that trouble? He could’ve just enslaved me again like before.
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- No matter how powerful a mage he is, is it even possible to summon someone from another world at will?
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- How can the Emperor afford to leave the imperial palace unattended for so long? When does he actually work?
“Haa…”
Jaha set down her pen and pressed her fingers to her temples. She had thought that laying everything out in order would reveal some clue or lead to a solution—but no such luck. All she’d done was exhaust her already sluggish mind, leaving her utterly drained.
“Not like anyone could read this anyway, since it’s in Hangeul.”
Still, it was better to be thorough.
Taking the candleholder and the papers, Jaha headed to the bathroom. She burned every last word she had painstakingly written, then poured water over the ashes until nothing remained. Only then did she return. Afterward, she lay on the bed for a brief rest before pulling out <Knight Rain> from its hiding place in the drawer.
Her heart had nearly stopped earlier.
Had Rikanan opened that drawer, there would have been no hiding the book’s existence.
Of course, there was no guarantee he remembered every single book in the study. Even if he saw the cover, he might have dismissed it as just another volume, unaware it had been smuggled in from outside. But with that baffling “No External Books Allowed” rule in place, he might have gone through the trouble of verifying its origin.
“He couldn’t have seen it… right?”
The drawer had been slightly ajar, but surely not enough for him to peer inside and spot its contents.
Jaha ran her palm over the cover once before flipping it open, clinging to the slim hope that—beyond Henryke’s Necklace—there might be something useful within. But aside from the protagonists’ romantic entanglements, she found nothing of value.
With a sigh, she waited for dawn before summoning Ena.
After returning <Lady Knight Rain>, Jaha exchanged the usual remarks about the story, chatted idly for a while, then deftly steered the conversation toward her real objective.
“There’s a book I’d like to get—do you think you could find it for me?”
“It shouldn’t be too difficult… What kind of book is my lady looking for?”
“Lately, I’ve grown interested in magic. Is there something like a comprehensive guide on all existing spells?”
“Ah, do you mean an encyclopedia of magic?”
“Yes. And the latest volume of the Imperial Annals series as well.”
“Understood. I’ll stop by the bookstore next time I go out.”
Ena agreed readily. Jaha thanked her and handed over a bracelet she’d prepared in advance.
“This is…”
“Consider it a token of my gratitude. Please take it.”
“Th-This is too much.”
Flustered, Ena waved her hands in refusal.
Jaha knew the reward was excessive for such a simple request, but she had no other choice. While she had plenty of jewelry, she lacked actual currency.
“It’s fine, really. Besides, I think it’ll suit you.”
When Jaha insisted, a glimmer of desire flickered in Ena’s eyes as she stared at the bracelet.
“Are you sure I can really accept something like this?”
“Of course. You’re doing me a favor, after all.”
“W-Well then… I’ll gratefully accept your gift, my lady.”
Once the conversation ended and Ena had left, Jaha pressed a hand to her chest. Her heart was beating faster than usual.
Surely, he won’t find out… right?
With the dice cast, Jaha waited in nervous anticipation for the outcome to unfold.
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