Chapter 66
‘Am I allowed to receive this kind of desire?’
Roina shrank back slightly. But before she could dwell on that thought, he pressed into her with overwhelming force. Stumbling back a step, she collapsed onto the couch behind her. Lutan followed her movement, bending down to press his body over hers.
Where is Fides?
The thought of the spirit—now in the form of a boy—suddenly crossed her mind, and she pushed against his chest. But he, too lost in the heat of the moment, didn’t budge and instead captured her lower lip between his own.
Ah, his lips were addictive.
That was the only thought in her mind.
Still, even if his appearance was that of a child, she didn’t want to behave like this in front of Fides. When she lightly patted his chest, he finally withdrew, albeit slightly.
Roina took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. His golden eyes, clouded with desire, had darkened. A strange, tingling sensation stirred low in her abdomen, making her furrow her brows.
Hurriedly glancing around, she realized that Fides was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps he had tactfully removed himself from the scene.
“I, um… I’m fine now.”
She now fully understood that this was no longer just an act of healing. Avoiding his gaze, thick with longing, she awkwardly lowered her eyes to the side.
He responded in a low, hoarse voice, slightly drawn out,
“…I see.”
That’s a relief.
His words trailed off at the end.
She pressed the back of her hand against her burning cheeks. It wasn’t just him—she also lost her composure whenever they were close.
“…I’m sorry. I’ve made things difficult for you again.”
Softly, he lowered his head and planted a wistful kiss on her forehead.
Somehow, he looked dejected.
That wasn’t her intention at all. She hadn’t meant to make him apologize. Uncertain of what to do, Roina averted her gaze once more.
“Roina, I want to protect you. I just… I don’t want to lose you again.”
Can’t there be another way?
He spoke in a pleading tone, resting his forehead against her shoulder.
As the large man leaned into her, she felt the weight of him, and a strange thought crossed her mind—like a wild beast bowing its head and nuzzling its master for affection.
If I had to compare, he feels like a sleek panther or a jaguar.
She placed her hand gently atop the Great Archmage’s head as she mused.
“You may go wherever you wish. If you want me to be present yet unseen, I will do so. But please… don’t leave me behind and go alone.”
He spoke those words as he pressed his lips to the nape of Roina’s neck. A warm breath brushed against her skin.
Ah, this feels similar to what I felt just moments ago…
Roina thought absentmindedly.
“Lutan… I do appreciate how much you cherish me. As I said before, the only reason I’m able to live as a human right now is entirely thanks to you.”
But could the life she lived in the imperial palace truly be called a human’s life? No, it couldn’t. That was why she had struggled so desperately.
The ones who had returned her life to her were Lutan, Maili, and Ethan. Because of them, she was alive.
Ethan… what happened to him? …Did he die?
She didn’t know. Until now, she had focused solely on reclaiming her life. Only now had her consciousness risen enough from the depths to think properly again. There was yet another thing she needed to confirm with the Imperial Crown Prince.
“But I still don’t know, Lord Lutan.”
Whether I can entrust my life to you.
Not long ago, she had willingly offered herself to serve him, yet now she hesitated. How contradictory humans were.
Had the miasma manipulated her heart and will?
Perhaps he had seen through it, which was why he had stopped her. A faint smile touched her lips. They had not known each other for long, yet he was truly a good person.
Lutan listened in silence before pulling her into another embrace.
This time, there was no trace of a man’s desire—only pure warmth and affection.
His lips pressed gently to her forehead, her hair, her eyelids, each touch filled with tender warmth. His gestures were so careful, as if afraid she might shatter at the slightest pressure.
“I will stay by your side until you know the answer. Do as your will dictates.”
Even before he had finished speaking, Roina sank into sleep. The exhaustion from earlier had finally reached its peak.
My light, my life, my god.
Lutan silently murmured as he gathered the sleeping Roina into his arms.
His god was now trapped within a fragile mortal body. To grant her only as many memories as she could endure—it was a difficult task. But one day, he hoped she would remember him, that she would call his name once more.
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