Chapter 126
Kazhan’s eyes flew open as he caught sight of the countless marks scattered across Ysaris’s pale neck and shoulders, barely hidden by the blanket. His gaze quickly darted to his own bare body and the disarray surrounding them. Anyone could see his shock.
“You don’t remember?”
Ysaris stared at him, feeling a mix of confusion and frustration. How was she supposed to respond when the man who had relentlessly claimed her throughout the night now acted as though he had no recollection of it?
She couldn’t pretend nothing had happened, nor could she blame him for the torment she endured. Explaining the details was out of the question—it was far too mortifying.
As heated memories flooded her mind, she pressed her lips tightly together. But her composure wavered when Kazhan reached out, grabbing her arm. His face, she realized, looked almost desperate.
“I…”
Kazhan’s voice was urgent, but he faltered, carefully choosing his words. His crimson eyes, filled with uncertainty, quivered as they studied her.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
In that moment, Ysaris caught a glimpse of fear in him. The image of him pleading with her through tears the night before overlapped with the man in front of her now.
‘He’s… afraid I’ll hate him.’
Suddenly, she understood. All the care he had shown her, his attempts to win her over—it wasn’t about being loved. It was about avoiding rejection or distance.
This realization left her momentarily speechless. A part of her wanted to know what in his past had left him so fearful, but another part wanted to turn away from it entirely.
Her decision, however, came quickly. Ysaris had no intention of disturbing the peace they currently shared.
Whatever had happened in the past, Kazhan loved her deeply, and with their son Mikael in the picture, there was no room for discord between her and her imperial husband.
This was why she had chosen to ignore the vague discomfort that occasionally surfaced.
“Ysaa.”
“It’s… a little embarrassing.”
Prodded by Kazhan, Ysaris finally spoke, averting her gaze and pulling the blanket up to cover herself to her eyes.
“I gave you permission… It was difficult, but… I enjoyed it.”
The last part came as a soft murmur, her tone tinged with a hint of complaint. She curled into herself beneath the blanket, as if to shield her aching body. Yet Kazhan remained silent, his reaction unreadable.
‘Did I go too far?’
Feeling awkward, Ysaris risked a glance at him. His expression was impossible to describe, and countless emotions flickered in his crimson eyes before they finally settled.
“I see.”
Kazhan slowly lay back down beside her, propping his head up with one arm. His gaze was so tender it bordered on sweetness, making Ysaris momentarily forget how to breathe.
‘Ah.’
She mouthed soundlessly from beneath the blanket.
‘It’s that face again.’
The subtle curve of his lips, spreading into a radiant smile without him even realizing it, was breathtaking. The joy radiating from him was so beautiful that his expressionless sleeping face felt like a loss.
Though he was always handsome, no matter the situation…
“If you enjoyed it, shall we do it again?”
“Are you serious?”
Her disbelief made her revise her thoughts. Kazhan wasn’t beautiful—he was infuriating.
Sometimes, she felt an almost irresistible urge to pinch him.
* * *
The two of them took turns showering in the room’s bathroom before donning their robes. Since the day after a banquet typically started late, Kazhan could afford a leisurely morning even with the sun already high in the sky.
“Here are some bread and water. Let’s talk while we eat.”
Kazhan handed her a tray he had brought up from the kitchen while she was washing. Covered in marks, Ysaris had outright refused to leave the room, leaving them no choice but to eat there.
“There’s no need to be embarrassed now. It’s not like this is the first time you’ve borne my marks.”
“I don’t recall any of those times. Besides, you were so careful earlier, and now you’re speaking so bluntly.”
“You said you enjoyed it, didn’t you? I’m simply taking pride in satisfying you thoroughly, so just let me be.”
‘I definitely shouldn’t have said that.’
Too drained to argue, Ysaris gulped down her water. Her condition was the worst it had ever been, leaving her suspecting she might have caught a fever. Meanwhile, Kazhan seemed infuriatingly energetic, practically glowing with vitality.
“Still, I think there’s a lot we need to discuss.”
“…Yes, I suppose so.”
Breaking apart her bread into small pieces, Ysaris began organizing her thoughts. As the one who remembered more about the previous night, she took it upon herself to begin the conversation.
Discussion
1 Commentniki1da1