Chapter 274
“Do you understand what I mean? His Majesty had been running toward his own death—no matter when, where, or how. If you’re concerned, it shouldn’t be about his physical health, but his state of mind.”
This went beyond mere preparedness. It was clear how often he’d imagined his own death.
Whether it was because he wanted to die or simply suffered the side effects of his abilities was irrelevant. The outcome was the same either way.
Perhaps that was why he’d relinquished his heart without hesitation upon the Empress’s request. Compared to the hollow existence he’d clung to, the unbreakable slumber he now lay in seemed almost peaceful.
Temisian lowered his hand with a bitter expression. The will Ysaris hadn’t taken felt unnaturally heavy.
“This is why I dared resent you, Your Majesty. I can’t shake the thought that you were the one who finally drove him—already teetering on the edge—into the abyss. Intentionally or not.”
“I…”
Ysaris finally parted her lips, biting down to steady her trembling voice before speaking slowly.
“It’ll sound like an excuse, but… I truly didn’t know. I never meant to ask him to die in my daughter’s place.”
“Had you known—”
Temisian’s quiet voice cut through her guilt-laden reply.
“—would you still have begged him to save her, knowing it required his heart?”
“……!”
Ysaris’s blue eyes widened. The question, dredged from the chaos she hadn’t dared confront, sent fresh turmoil through her.
‘If forced to choose between Casillia and Kazhan—who would I have picked?’
She couldn’t answer. Of course the scales would tip toward her own child over a husband stained with love and hate.
She’d meant those words. Even if she’d known the conditions of Tennilath’s forced awakening, she likely would’ve asked him anyway—just more brokenly, drowning in guilt.
Kazhan must have known that too. He’d acted because he believed Casillia’s life outweighed his own.
“Ugh…”
A wave of nausea rose with her tangled emotions. Self-loathing, guilt toward Kazhan—yet also relief that Casillia lived. It was too much.
“I suspected as much. You don’t even deny it. Even after seeing how deeply His Majesty loved you.”
“……”
Now Ysaris understood Temisian’s condemnation. If she saw herself as monstrous, how much worse must it look to others?
Resentment and regret clashed. Kazhan’s death, once distant, now gripped her throat.
If she’d known, she might’ve listened. She shouldn’t have pushed him away.
Her panic over Casillia’s fate was no excuse. Even now, with tragedy here, she had to take responsibility.
“……Where is Kazhan now?”
Cold sweat trailed down her nape as she forced out the question. Clutching her trembling hands, she met Temisian’s inscrutable gaze.
“The imperial vault. It’s too soon to reveal his state, so we’ve kept him concealed there.”
“…You conducted the ritual in the vault?”
“Yes. Likely clinging to the hope that immediate heart regeneration might revive him.”
Questions surfaced, but Ysaris swallowed them. Instead, she shut her eyes, inhaled deeply, and exhaled.
“Take me to him. To where Kazhan is.”
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