What I Gained by Giving My Body - Chapter 2.3

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The second experience was different from the first in every way. Roxias Akbar did not go easy on Caitlyn in the slightest, and he pushed her until she finally shed tears. It was a s****l encounter that could only be described as violent. Ironically, it was for that very reason that Caitlyn was able to hold onto her sanity until the end.

‘This is better, actually.’

Caitlyn tried to think that way, but the moistness she felt around her eyes was betraying her reason. The sofa, which had not been used for a long time, could not withstand the intense act of the two and collapsed. Far from stopping, the Archduke pushed her against the wall, forcing her body to fold in half.

Her back was pressed against the hard, cold wall, but the pain and pleasure she felt below made her mind even more confused. Caitlyn closed her eyes tight and did not open them. It wasn’t simply because she didn’t want to see Archduke Akbar. She was afraid of herself, feeling pleasure in this…… emotionless, intense, and merciless act.

It certainly hurt. But the pleasure that blurred with that pain and paralyzed Caitlyn’s reason……. A finger touched the corner of her eye. It wasn’t Caitlyn’s.

“Open your eyes.”

Archduke Akbar growled.

“I said, open your eyes.”

Caitlyn did not obey that command. There was no reason to obey. After all, Roxias Akbar and she were mixing bodies purely because of the power. So why should she do anything other than offering her body to Archduke Akbar?

Archduke Akbar moved his body even more roughly as if to punish her for refusing his words. Caitlyn realized for the first time that her body was that flexible. Also, she realized for the first time that she could accept a man this deeply.

How long had passed? Finally, Roxias Akbar pulled his body away from her. Caitlyn waited until he left his spot and then snapped her eyes open. Her body trembled. It wasn’t because of the pain that felt like her body was being torn to pieces in her lower half. It was because the hope that today might be the last—that hope had been shattered along with her future, which was still clearly visible in her eyes. This cursed power still remained within her.

Just how many more times would she have to mix bodies with Roxias Akbar? And what kind of side would this man show in the future? The even more despairing fact was that she thought it was an act she would get used to as time went on, but it was actually the opposite. Just looking at today, it was so.

‘……It was completely different from the first time.’

The first time…… wasn’t bad. At least Caitlyn thought so. But today……. Caitlyn wiped away the moisture gathered at the corners of her eyes. She couldn’t understand why, but Archduke Akbar had shown a side that was completely different from before.

Was Archduke Akbar’s true nature originally like this? Or was it because his mood was particularly foul today? Caitlyn, who was deep in thought, belatedly realized that the Archduke had returned and was staring at her intently. Their gazes met before she could react. The Archduke suddenly spoke.

“I thought you were sleeping, but I see you aren’t.”

“…….”

Caitlyn said nothing. In the Archduke’s hand was a glass of water. Still holding the glass, he continued toward Caitlyn.

“If you need anything, tell the head maid. Don’t suffer alone like a fool.”

“……I don’t.”

At her slightly hoarse voice, Archduke Akbar’s eyebrows twitched.

“You look like you’re in pain.”

Caitlyn inhaled. It was true that she was in pain, but because Archduke Akbar was the very culprit, she only felt he was being hypocritical. Her back, which felt as if it were scratched from the rough wall, her lower half, which felt like it would split apart, the tender skin of her neck and collarbone, which were sore from being gnawed on…… it was all what Archduke Akbar had done to her.

“It is not something Your Grace needs to worry about.”

Archduke Akbar tapped the table with his finger.

“Of course I worry. What if Baronet Hardick protests, saying I harmed his only sister?”

“…….”