Chapter 29
Chapter 29
The more she spoke, the more she sank into self-loathing and guilt. She felt pathetic. He wasn’t even who she’d thought he was. He held a grudge against her. And yet the thought of losing him made her heart feel like it was tearing. She replayed old memories. Every mistake she might have made. The dampness from the bath she’d thought she’d dried off suddenly gathered at her eyes.
People only realize what they had after they lose it. Only then do they look back.
“You were such a precious friend. I never once told you, did I…? I was always grateful. And I’m sorry.”
A confession to a friend who was already gone. Too late. It made her sad.
Vladimir’s head was a mess of words that wouldn’t form sentences. He couldn’t parse what she meant. Not all at once. He turned it over for a long moment. Then looked at her with a somewhat stupid expression.
“I’m cursing you? Why?”
Had the dictionary definition of curse changed without him knowing?
Silence. He stood there dumbfounded, chewing over her words. They both fumbled with their own thoughts and questions. Milana broke the standoff.
“I did something wrong to you. And I was so clueless I didn’t even know it…”
“What?”
The sound that came out of Vladimir was genuinely incredulous. His voice went shrill.
“Milana, you did something wrong? Something I don’t know about?”
“Huh?”
Silence again.
Their eyes spun as fast as their racing minds. They looked at each other. Then at Vladimir’s Milana collection. Then back at each other. Over and over. Slowly their thoughts settled. Their mouths fell open weakly. What filled the empty space between their lips was shock. A dawning realization of ‘no way.’
“Milana, don’t tell me you thought my collection was for a curse… Right?”
“Th-Then why did you collect all this?”
Milana was horrified. She pointed at the massive amount of “Milana collection” filling the chest. Her eyes darted around.
“Anyone would think they’re curse tools! Huge amounts of my photos. My belongings. And on top of that, why do you have my nails and hair?! And those red bloodstains…? Just draw a magic circle here and it’s the textbook set for a curse…”
The young mage pointed out each item with her finger. The man pressed his temples with both hands. A severe headache was coming on.
She thought these were for a curse. So that’s why she trembled like that back then.
The thing that had tormented him most about Milana’s reaction was the fear in her eyes. He knew better than anyone the deep valley between a mafioso and an ordinary person. Maybe it was his own insecurity.
Ha… I’ve been rampaging and making a fool of myself all alone? The serious conflict that had boiled between them. It was all built on misunderstandings and guesses. A one-man show. Drumming and trumpeting by himself. He shut his eyes tight.
He should’ve smashed his own head instead of that perfectly good door.
“Little boss, coming in. Dinner is ready.”
The scarred man pushed a food cart past the two frozen people. Clatter, clatter. Perfect timing.
“…So Vladimir. What is all this? Why did you collect it? Can you explain?”
Milana cut through the wafting smell of food and demanded. Vladimir had been debating whether to just slide past this moment. No more escape routes. He let out a groan.
This was the worst. He wanted to hit himself for making things spiral like this over a stupid misunderstanding. He hadn’t wanted to confess this way. He couldn’t believe Milana still hadn’t caught on. If he’d known, he wouldn’t have used such a twisted, aggressive method. Mixing bodies first…
“I’ve watched you for a long time.”
“Why? We were always together. There was no need to…”
Ha… this is insane.
His fingers pressed harder against his temples. His whole body went numb from the rising tension, anxiety, and shame. The worst feelings he’d ever felt. Through countless hardships and trials, never once had he experienced anything like this. He let the words out like a sigh.
“Milana, ah, I mean… I like you.”
“I’ve always liked you too, Bo— no, Vladimir.”
“No, not that.”
He couldn’t look directly at her shining eyes. He turned his gaze away. Right where the scarred man stood, setting up the food, ears perked up like a donkey.
He knew he couldn’t back out now. He mumbled the words.
“…I love you.”
Standing there, looking at Milana in front of all the traces of his filthy feelings. A sigh came out on its own.
“These are from secretly following you. Collecting your face and your things… s**t.”
He could feel his own earlobes turning red.
“When you weren’t next to me, I still wanted to keep seeing you.”
Also used them to comfort himself sometimes. He obviously didn’t say that part.
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