Chapter 53
Her words became a blade and drove deep into his heart. The shock made him want to clutch his chest and collapse, but he couldn’t fall here.
“What, why… Then, you mean yesterday, with that man…”
His breathing would not come properly, and his words broke off unnaturally. But Leila didn’t seem to notice his condition.
“If you mean Sir Piache, no. That gentleman is… Anyway, the reason I came to this decision is all thanks to you. My parents will be grateful to you.”
Thanks to me? What does that even mean? Everything was chaos.
“My parents’ troublesome eldest daughter has finally decided to marry, so I’m sure they’ll be lining up men to introduce to me. So… please be at ease from now on.”
Within the darkness flooding his vision, one thing was clear, the loud noise ringing in his ears. For a moment he thought the sky had collapsed, but it was the scream of his own heart pounding with anxiety.
“Then why, suddenly decide on marriage… our relationship… did you perhaps grow to dislike me…?”
He couldn’t even speak properly, like a fool. The feeling of wandering heaven until yesterday and falling into hell overnight was horrific.
What could have changed the heart of Leila, who had loved him so much. He had to find out. If the cause was himself, he was willing to fix anything. He could even be reborn as the kind of man she wanted. Yet Leila only frowned as if troubled by his question.
“…Isn’t this what you wanted?”
Her face as she said that looked terribly sad. It was the first time she had shown him such an expression, and Bjorn’s heart dropped straight down instead of pounding.
“What I wanted? I have never wished for you to marry another, another man.”
Bjorn answered as if crying out. Soon his forgotten conscience returned and condemned his shamelessness. Not long ago he had wished she would find another man. Was this pain the price of that arrogance.
At his firm denial Leila finally let out a deep sigh. She looked resigned.
“If you really want to know the reason…”
Now what rang in Bjorn’s ears was no longer his heartbeat.
“The evening before last, I heard a conversation between you and your colleague. I wanted to check whether you returned safely to the temple, so I followed you. I lost you halfway, but somehow I ended up inside the temple, and when I found you again I heard that conversation.”
What deafened his ears now was the sound of the despair that ruled his entire life opening its huge jaws.
“I didn’t intend to eavesdrop. But I thought my name was mentioned, so I listened for a moment. I apologize for that.”
Yes, cruel fate would never allow him to become happy so easily. But Bjorn struggled one last time to resist it.
“I will explain. I can explain. It is true I deceived you all this time, Miss Leila. I was foolish. The feelings I didn’t realize until now…”
But Leila didn’t listen to his rushed, incoherent words. She seemed to have already made all her decisions. It was hopeless.
“After hearing that conversation, everything made sense. I had thought the you I’d seen recently was far too different from the man I knew. If it was all an act, that explains it. And, don’t worry, I understand your feelings. If anyone is at fault, it is me for placing such a heavy burden on you.”
“That is not it. Miss Leila, I…”
“I don’t say this lightly. I truly think it’s understandable. A woman who does not marry even at this age and only looks at you would be burdensome. If I were you, I would have done the same.”
“Do not speak like that. I was the foolish one. Please, a chance to explain…”
He pleaded for a chance, but Leila seemed determined to give none.
“I am not angry at you. I’m actually glad I learned your true feelings like this. Only now have I come to my senses.”
“Leila, please listen to me…”
What made him freeze, clinging to her and even forgetting honorifics, was the next thing Leila said.
“If I could give just one excuse, since I might never get another chance… I truly never wanted to become anything with you, sir.”
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