Chapter 317
It’s okay.
It’s okay because I’m alive.
I kept trying to comfort myself, but in the end, tears welled up again and overflowed.
Crouching down, I buried my face in my knees and tried to hold back my sobs. I didn’t want any sound to escape.
Right after Hermann said I was worth researching, I was dragged off and subjected to all sorts of biological experiments. They drew blood and injected me with unknown substances.
I didn’t die, nor was I stripped naked and groped by Hermann in front of everyone. So, it might not have been the worst, but at that moment, it was as excruciating as being hit by a truck.
One arm, which had been injected so many times, was numb from the shoulder to the fingertips. My body was covered in bruises.
Would it get better after a few nights of sleep? What if the feeling never comes back?
…No, even if I get better, what’s the point? If I have to go through this again tomorrow…
How many times did I pass out and collapse, over and over again? Eventually, one of the researchers cautiously intervened.
If they continued the experiments on me, I might be lost forever since I had just recovered from being bedridden for several days due to the pain.
That’s how I barely managed to return to the room where the Guides stayed.
I couldn’t understand. Hermann and the Espers outside the line would have wanted the Center to collapse due to the rampage of an S-Class Esper. So, they would want to kill me, who had thwarted their plans several times.
Why were they conducting various experiments on me instead?
Of course, this saved my life… but I wasn’t sure if this was something to be grateful for anymore.
I felt hopeless. By the time Claude might find me, my body and mind would already be in ruins…
“Rose…?”
I tried to hold back, but when Helga heard my sniffles, she lifted the blanket and got up.
She was about to comfort me but stopped abruptly. Even in the dim light of the late night, she noticed the vivid bruises on my arms and legs.
Helga hesitated for a moment, her lips trembling, then she whispered.
“…You’ll get used to it.”
Surprisingly, her words were quite comforting. Dwelling on depressing thoughts wouldn’t help at all. So, if it was unbearable, it was better to think simply.
Yes, no matter how painful it is, if you go through it a few times, you’ll get used to it. And someday, Claude will come and save me.
“…What are you doing?”
Helga asked as she saw me suddenly clasping my hands together as if in prayer while sniffing.
To her, I must have seemed strange. But it didn’t matter.
“…I’m sending a telepathic message.”
“To whom?”
“To my Esper, who is desperately searching for me right now.”
Despite our polar opposite personalities, there were moments when Claude and I astonishingly clicked.
〈How did you know? That I especially wanted to eat this today?〉
I don’t usually like sour things. So, Claude generally doesn’t stock sour snacks in our fridge.
But sometimes, without any reason, I crave those snacks. And on those days, when I find a lemon tart prepared at home, it’s touching and even a bit scary.
…Could he really be reading my mind? Does he have some hidden power like telepathy or mind reading that he hasn’t told me about?
When I glare at him, he rolls his eyes in exasperation and casually replies.
〈I just happened to notice it today.〉
There were so many moments like that, so eventually, I just accepted it. I thought, maybe when I really want something, he can feel it too.
So, I’m sending a signal. Telling him that I’m here, to come find me soon.
Then, after a moment of silence, Helga spoke in a low voice.
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