Campus Log - Chapter 22

“Can you see well?”

Ryu Eun-seok, blocking the space behind me like the size of a refrigerator door, asked.

“Yeah.”

I usually hated crowded places, but here was different. Even if someone brushed past with a bag or a long telephoto lens poked over my shoulder, I didn’t mind. Seeing the pandas up close with my own eyes was worth the patience.

Even if the couple right next to us started smooching obnoxiously, I wouldn’t let it ruin my precious viewing time.

“Alright. Go ahead and look.”

Ryu Eun-seok gestured toward the pandas. His jaw, sharply defined as he clenched his teeth, drew my attention.

His forearm was pressed against the shoulder of the man next to him. The fairly stocky man stopped kissing, glanced at Ryu Eun-seok, then puffed out his chest and pulled his girlfriend closer in front of him, even stretching a hand forward to touch the glass wall.

But Ryu Eun-seok didn’t budge. Instead, he pushed me closer to the glass wall, using his broad shoulders to completely shield my side and back.

The larger man was now mostly hidden behind Ryu Eun-seok, only the top of his head visible.

I didn’t know why the two men were locked in this silent standoff, but thanks to it, I could watch the mother panda, just waking up, nibbling bamboo shoots from very close without anyone interfering.

However, a staff announcement told us it was time to leave. We had to clear the area for the next group of visitors.

“Is that it?”

Ryu Eun-seok asked sulkily. After driving an hour to get here, being told to leave after only ten minutes seemed ridiculous from his perspective.

“Just line up and go in again.”

For panda fans, standing in this line ten times or more a day was normal. Ordinary visitors who came for rides and happened to stop by to see the pandas usually just glanced and left. Today, I had planned to go around at least five times in Yongin.

“Aren’t you hungry?”

“No.”

It was just past lunchtime. I glanced at Ryu Eun-seok. We had to make the most of the relatively quiet time to see the pandas. Going to eat now would break the flow.

“If you’re hungry, grab something nearby. I’ll stay and watch the pandas.”

“I’m not hungry either.”

Ryu Eun-seok pressed the hood of my raincoat a little further down as he answered.

“I don’t want to eat alone either.”

With the brim of the hood covering down to his nose, I couldn’t see his face clearly. Tilting my head back, the black…

The umbrella covered the top of my head. I was already wearing a raincoat, so I didn’t understand why he even put up the umbrella.

Tilting it like that, his back would get soaked.

I was about to scold Ryu Eun-seok when I remembered what I had tucked in my raincoat pocket. I quickly reached in and pulled out a handful of chocolate-coated energy bars.

“Eat this.”

“Wow.”

Ryu Eun-seok’s eyes sparkled.

“I’ll eat well.”

He devoured three bars in an instant and smiled with satisfaction. So much for not being hungry—it was a total lie.

Should I be considerate and step out of line to get him a proper meal? I’d skipped class and even brought him all the way to Yongin; was I making him suffer too much? But he came because he wanted to, didn’t he? I never suggested we go together first.

Before I knew it, it was our turn, and we were entering. Feeding him energy bars and just spinning around made me feel like I was mistreating Ryu Eun-seok. I was enjoying it, but he was following out of curiosity. The feeling of guilt pricked me as he trailed right behind.

The father panda was enjoying free time alone in the outdoor enclosure. Most visitors were looking at the twin pandas inside, so there was no crowd pressing against us like before.

“He eats well even by himself.”

Ryu Eun-seok muttered, still angling the umbrella toward me. The father panda, despite the fine drizzle, was carefully selecting bamboo, using the leaves as a roof.

“Pandas live alone to begin with. Even the twins will have to become independent soon.”

“Then aren’t they lonely?”

“That’s a human way of looking at it.”

Ryu Eun-seok turned his head and studied my profile. Maybe he thought my answer was too cold. But it was the truth—what could I do? There are creatures for whom being alone is simply natural.

“Must be nice.”

A bitter voice slipped out beside me.

“I wish I couldn’t feel loneliness either.”

Ryu Eun-seok stepped a little closer. By now, I was tucked fully under the umbrella, enough that I wouldn’t have needed a raincoat at all. In the corner of my vision, I caught sight of one of his shoulders slowly darkening with damp.

“They probably do feel lonely sometimes.”

I spoke more quickly than usual because the realization hit me that I had been too indifferent.

With his family struggling, drifting apart from his friends, and dealing with one hardship after another, it wasn’t right to dismiss him as weak. Maybe I’d ended up pointing it out too bluntly. It wasn’t my place to meddle, but that didn’t mean I was allowed to be cold and accusatory either.