Chapter 23
With those words, she felt his hand lightly wrap around her shoulder.
As his gentle pull drew her slightly back, she stumbled a bit, and her back brushed against his firm chest. Her face flushed hot. It had been so long since she’d felt such contact.
The more she tried to pull away, the more tightly the arms around her bound her in place.
“Ha……”
With a long sigh, Euphen rested his head against Lynette’s shoulder.
“Guide me.”
He whispered softly.
“You need to let go for me to… ngh.”
She tried once again to push his arm away. His large hand slid lightly up from her shoulder and touched her neck.
At that unguarded moment, pain spread through her, and a weak moan slipped out. She quickly pressed her lips together.
His palm pressed against the pulsing beat of her throat, then slowly moved upward to her cheek.
“What is it about that woman that you like so much?”
“Do you dislike her?”
Lynette carefully lowered the hand that was pressing against her cheek. The pain so close to her head made it feel like her skull was ringing, and it was unbearable.
Without a word, Euphen laced his fingers through hers. The familiar sensation spread through her palm.
“I’m not thinking about anything.”
He murmured with a satisfied breath.
“I was just a little angry.”
“Why?”
“You dislike spending time with me, don’t you?”
She barely managed to wrench herself free from him. She wanted to stay by his side, but she must not. That was why she pushed him away.
And yet, to hear him speak so regretfully now… With what heart had she pushed him away?
Lynette tried to untangle their clasped fingers, but the more she struggled, the tighter he seized her hand.
“I’m just a fake Guide temporarily at His Highness the Imperial Prince’s side.”
“You’re also my Guide.”
“A temporary Guide.”
“How many times must I tell you.”
The man frowned slightly. His reaction made it clear he couldn’t understand why she still called herself “temporary.”
“Right now, you’re the only Guide I have.”
“Soon, His Highness the Imperial Prince’s true partner will appear.”
“Quite some time has already passed.”
Would he be surprised if she told him they had already met?
Lynette slowly raised her head and gazed into those blue eyes.
“Surely someone far more suited to His Highness than me will appear.”
He furrowed his brow and let out a low sigh.
“I don’t know why I must have a conversation about someone who doesn’t even exist yet.”
“I…”
“No matter what anyone says, right now you’re my Guide. And I’m satisfied with that.”
Cutting her off as if he no longer wanted to hear anything, Euphen spoke in a stiffened voice.
Lynette’s lips trembled. She wished with all her heart that he wouldn’t act this way. Because it forced her to imagine something terrifying… that he loved her.
“I’m someone who will leave one day.”
She barely managed to push the words out. Not once, before her return, had she ever said something like this.
Even knowing there would be an end, the two of them both pretended it was forever. They spoke as if this time would never come to a close, as if they could spend their lives together.
They didn’t want to think of the end. They thought that if they acted as though the end didn’t exist, maybe the true last moment would never arrive.
“Even if another Guide appears for me……”
“Your Highness.”
She shouldn’t interrupt someone above her, but she was too afraid to hear the rest. If Euphen admitted to harboring even the smallest feelings, Lynette would have no choice but to rejoice.
Because she loved him. She still loved this man.
She had given everything, enough to decide she would throw away her entire life this time for him.
If she were to be repaid, even the tiniest bit, for such feelings, she knew she wouldn’t be able to stop herself from being happy. Which only meant it would become even harder to let him go.
“What Your Highness feels is nothing more than an illusion.”
Lynette spoke with a dry voice.
“You’re only confused for a while because of the sensations that Guiding brings. I know well what that feels like.”
She gathered the words she had once heard from him and repeated them, as though she too were feeling the same things he was.
‘To feel this kind of sensation… it’s harder not to fall in love.’
Just being together, just the simple act of holding hands, brought an unparalleled satisfaction, a fullness. How could anyone reject that?
If Euphen had not been in Lynette’s heart, she might have given her heart to Sillian instead.
They said the one who made you feel this perfectly content and complete would be your destined partner, how could anyone not waver?
Would everything have gone smoothly if it had turned out that way?
If she had loved her fated partner, awakened, and guided Sillian while feeling that same unparalleled satisfaction… then perhaps she might have been able to resent Euphen. She might have thought of him as nothing more than the man who brought her pain, and lived while holding onto the hope that one day she could escape him.
But even imagining hating and resenting the man before her made one side of her chest ache.
“You never felt such things before being Guided, did you?”
Lynette gazed blankly into his blue eyes. Through the hands still tightly interlocked, pain spread down to her toes.
Even without such sensations, she had loved Euphen. No matter how much he hurt her, no matter how completely he broke her down, she had still thought it was fine.
“I know what kind of feelings it brings. How fulfilling, how happy, how joyful it is.”
“Lynette.”
“To the point you can’t even put into words how lovable the other person feels.”
His lips pressed tightly together.
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