After I Died, My Husband Went Mad - Chapter 174

He couldn’t even think of wiping his tears away. The muddled emotions, which had squeezed their way out between the smallest cracks of his tear ducts, dripped steadily onto the floor at his feet.

“I’m sorry. I know these meaningless words can’t make up for the wounds and injustices you’ve suffered, but still… I’m sorry. If I don’t say this, it feels like I’ll suffocate and die. Bella, please.”

Heavy, suffocating emotions. Things he couldn’t even put into words, too shameless and embarrassing to voice. Dehart knew that the more he spoke, the more excuses he made, the greater his misery would grow. But still, he couldn’t help it.

“I can’t dare to ask you to listen, but still, I beg you. Just once, let me speak in front of you, just this one time.”

He knelt silently before Sebelia. With his hand, which had been clenched so tightly that blood had dripped, now flat on the ground, he looked up at her. Tears and blood mixed, staining the floor beneath him.

“I only now realize that you never betrayed me, not even for a moment. I now realize that you were always sincere with me. No, actually, it’s all an excuse. The truth is, I didn’t have the courage to accept that precious feeling.”

Dehart closed his eyes tightly. Tears fell in droplets.

He couldn’t have not felt it. He couldn’t have not known. How could he not have noticed her sparkling gaze toward him, the affectionate touches, the sighs full of longing every time they parted?

He had just been afraid. He couldn’t trust her love, couldn’t find the courage to believe in it, so out of fear, he turned away and ignored it. She was so different from him. She had grown up in a childhood filled with love, not one stained with screams and loss, like his own.

Dehart had deceived himself like that, and this was the result.

“I thought you could never love someone like me.”

He keenly felt his own foolishness. He had ruined everything. Foolish, cowardly, twisted, ignorant—he had thrown away the opportunity he had fought so hard for.

“I’m sorry.”

If he had just had the courage, if he had believed in her even just a little more, they could have had a happy ending, like a fairy tale. They could have had the beautiful, harmonious family he had dreamed of as a child.

“It’s all my fault. I was too inadequate, unable to believe that someone like you could love me, that you were sincere with me. That’s why I turned away, because I didn’t want to get hurt… I didn’t listen to you until the end.”

Thud, thud. Tears fell. The creaking floorboards and worn carpet couldn’t bear the weight of the deep, thick moisture.

“So that’s it. A fool like me would fall for your every word. I believed your sweet lies and soft whispers, thinking you truly loved me.”

That’s why he thought he had to push her away. Looking back now, it was such a stupid and foolish judgment, but at that time, Dehart believed it was the only way.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

He cried silently, lying on the floor, as if he wanted to drain every drop of moisture from his body and let his heart dry up.

Sebelia quietly looked down at him. As the color of the wooden floor darkened, his sorrow deepened. Dehart crawled across the floor like a blind man and cried silently.

A trail was formed. The trail of tears left behind by a man who, seeking invisible salvation, spun in place. The first light of dawn scattered across it. When she turned to look down at Dehart, his tear-streaked face sparkled in the sunlight. His lips whispered her name, like a groan.

“Bella.”

He no longer called her by the name “Sebelia.” Sebelia quietly bent her legs. Dehart, curled up like a child, slept with bruised eyes.

“Mm.”

At his call, Sebelia responded, brushing her lips across Dehart’s blue-tinged lips. From his bloodied lips, her name flowed again. She caressed his cheek and looked out the window.

Dawn was breaking.

* * *

The dawn passed, and morning arrived. For some, it would be remembered as a dawn filled with stained tears, but for others, it would be engraved as a dawn of victory.

“It seems the Rash family has safely fallen into the hands of Marquis Limms.”

“Good.”

Ryan coldly muttered as he surveyed the wounded soldiers. Thanks to proper defense and countermeasures, none of them had suffered fatal injuries.

“There’s no need to spread rumors.”

Ryan spoke as he unfolded the special edition of the newspaper that had been scattered on the streets this morning. As planned, Marquis Limms had easily seized the tower and rescued the Rash family.

He was so confident in his success that Rash, as he left Hillend Hall, loudly proclaimed his victory, and the result was a hastily printed special edition of the newspaper distributed in the early morning.

[What are the intentions of Marquis Limms, who raised his sword against his nephew? : The power struggle within Inverness.]

[Is he really an innocent victim? About Rash Inverness.]

There was a success in greeting the quietly invading Marquis Limms with such noise. The peaceful rebellion of Limms, which had quietly started last evening, had been carried out so loudly by the time the morning arrived.

Thanks to that, the splendid special edition of the newspaper was now scattered all over the streets.

“Go tell the servants that there’s no need to worry anymore.”

“Understood.”

“I should also write apology cards to the nobles staying in the villas around Hillend Hall. I’ll have to apologize for disturbing the dawn with family matters.”